Saturday, May 28, 2011

It's a Pool Party, Bitches!

Marty: "I've got my beach towel ready, bitches! It's time for my Memorial Day party! I'd like to thank Toad Manning for helping me host. He's the most hospitable rapist in town."

Happy Saturday and Memorial Day weekend, lovelies! First and foremost: My most sincerest apologies for my MIAness. When I mean I had the DAY FROM HELL on Thursday, I mean Satan like took the wheel of my f*@king life. Woof! Anyway, I also forgot to mention that we are packing to move all weekend. Anywho....as of late I've taken great pride in my morning consistency but I got thrown a curve this week. Sorry! Thankfully all is well on this busy weekend. Ok, so I'm doing a drive-by of Thursday first. I'm then going to respond to the shit-ton of comments I have and THEN I'll do Friday's post either right after or this evening. How's that? Oh, and how I found a pic of Susan Haskell with a beach towel is beyond me but I did. Ok let's do this...

Thursday, May 26th--Marty's Playhouse Version of the Show(i.e. fast, all over the place commentary. borderline crazy)
1. This shit with Tomas/Blair and Starr/James is f*@king heinous and if Renee is mentioned again I will die from being insulted.
2. I tell you what that Christian works his ass off right? For his mom at Buenos Dias, Capricorn, LU and he does that boxing shit. This bastard never sleeps.
3. I forgot Roxy existed I haven't seen her in so damn long. I love how they make her look like she just got f*@ked in a truck stop bathroom. Nice.
4. Times! How come in the hallway of the LPD it looks like they are filming a reality show? The camera is more shaky than Marty's mental health!
5. OMG a Barry Manilow reference. I will now sing "Copacabana" for the rest of the evening. Dammit.
6. LOL!!!! Marty hid Liam behind the fence. Awesome town.
7. OMG...thank God I'm drinking wine to get through these Rama/Christian scenes. Yes, it is 3:30 on Saturday and I'm drinking. However, I'm moving which is effing sucky/atrocious/awful/migraine inducing. I get a free pass. Plus, it's a holiday weekend. Word.
8. STOP IT!!!! I CANNOT DEAL WITH RENEE REFERENCES. I'M SO F*@KING INSULTED. SHOW HER DIVINE ASS, PLEASE. DAMMIT!
9. Mushroom Thingies?! REALLY (In my best Nora voice)?! Starr, get a life.
10. Delphina put Rex and Gigi back together? Wait...did I miss this?
11. Aaaaand Marty just pulled out the gun. Score. Oh, and p.s., Marty will single handedly save this episode because it sucks major ass.
12. "Savory Mushroom Bites?" I figured the Palace could come up with a fancier name than that. What a shitty name for an appetizer. This is the Palace, not Chili's. Word.
13. Who gives a shit about Starr and James first time? If you do, that's fine. I can't deal with it and don't want to discuss it.
14. Blair will f*@k anything with an ounce of testosterone.
15. THIS EPISODE IS TERRIBLE!!!! However, the Marty/Toad scenes are quite enjoyable.
16. These John and Brody scenes are falling flat.
17. Aw hell...Delphina? Lord help us. MH suggested this: Delphina needs to make Bo and Nora move out of the garret so she can move back in...EXCELLENT idea! Then once Marty leaves her house because she either dies or is committed then B/N can move into Marty's. Everyone wins!
18. Ok, so these Palace hotel scenes are not funny or entertaining. I don't like them. Maybe because I need Blair/Tomas to not be boring (which I still can't see how these two are boring but they are...unbelieveable) and I just don't give two shits about Starr and James. Who needs Ambien when you have this shit? I'm passing out!
19. Marty.Is.The.Most.Awesome.Crazy.Person.Ever. Susan Haskell is such a show stopper!
20. If I could drop a bomb on the Palace right now, I would. However, I'd save Ted King so I could have my way with him. These scenes are insulting. I'm more offended by the Renee references though. I know I know...I cannot let it go! I'm sorry!
21. I'm so f*@king bored with this episode! I'm TRYING my damndest to post something borderline decent here! Bear with me!
22. Aaaaaand, I did just pee a little: Marty has been staying in Todd's poolhouse!!!!! AHHHHH!!!!! YES! I love it! So Mr. Navy Seal was right...Marty and baby Liam were there the whole time! Love that the peeping tom was Marty's Playhouse. Rockin'...
23. I'm not even really enjoying these Natty/Roxy/Delphina scenes...sorry! Richmond Chandler, I know you liked them right? :)
24. I'm so bored I'm just gonna randomly type comments for the last half. ATROSH!
25. I love that the Pennsylvania Astrological Society is also staying at the Palace. Even better: Tomas just made fun of Starr for saying mushroom thingies.
26. Blair and Tomas do LOOK good together. I just need them to be interesting and that has yet to happen.
27. I'm sorry but that sock Natalie is holding can't be Liam's!!! It's like a sock Ross would wear...I mean, come on!
28. Aaaaand when James said "It's just the beginning" in response to Starr saying "This is it" well I just wanted to f*@king slit my throat. After I puked of course...
29. I FLOVE that there is a Heimlich Maneuver poster in the Bueons Dias. hahahaha! I can think of a few people on this show who need to choke...on hot dogs. Hmmm.
30. I wonder if Delphina could tell me if the shitty characters on this show are leaving soon...
31. May I just say I'm starting to adore Brody.
32. "Oh don't worry...we'll be in the pool house. It's very private out there." Please Marty...don't ever leave this show. Aaaaaaaand, Marty just said Tomas Delgado in a hispanic accent! She.Is.The.Shit.

This episode was awful. Thank God for Marty's Playhouse/Pool House! Ok...responding to comments and packing more then I'll do Friday's episode.

Much love and again...so sorry for the delay!

xxxx,
Mija

3 comments:

  1. Ok, Mari-Ella, here I go with SPOILERS (so everybody - don't read this if you don't want to know what I do - lol):

    Monday, no new episode, it's a re-run. whateves
    The rest of the week:

    After Clint is confronted by Rex about his public confession, he flatlines.

    Cutter kicks Joey, Aubrey and Rama out of the Buchanan Mansion.

    Shane responds positively to Ford's advice.

    Matthew has a life-altering complication.

    Nate feels guilty and heads to the hospital to find out how Matthew's doing.

    Ford visits Tess at St. Ann's.

    Abby and Rama exchange punches.

    Viki and Rex are there when Clint's heart gives out.

    Bo and Nora are rocked by devastating news.

    Roxy slips to John about Natalie and Brody's kiss.

    Aubrey and Ford make a deal in regards to Ryder.

    Marty is stunned to hear that Natalie's still alive.

    James gets Ford to admit he's falling for Tess.

    John makes a discovery during his search for Liam.

    Joey plans to divorce Aubrey, so he can reunite with Kelly.

    and coming up:

    Someone important overhears Nate confide his worry over Matthew's condition to Deanna.

    Matthew is deemed to be nearly brain dead.

    Clint and Matthew share the same blood-type.

    Bo and Nora have to decide if they should donate Matthew's heart to Clint.

    Clint tells Natalie and Joey he doesn't have long to live.

    David returns.

    Echo plans to ruin David and Dorian's happiness.

    Aubrey and Joey have to stay together for Ryder's sake.

    Viki goes to drastic measures in an attempt to bring Jessica back.

    Someone unexpected gets a hold of Marty's session tape.

    The search for Liam brings Natalie and Brody closer.

    Marty plans to finish Natalie off.

    Brody comes to Natalie's rescue.

    Karma will come back to bite Marty.

    John professes his love to Natalie and promises never to leave her.

    Natalie tells John that Liam is his son.

    T.M. escapes and arrives in Llanview.

    T.M. interacts with Blair, Starr, Viki, and Tea.

    T.M. comes face to face with Todd.

    Blair and Gigi argue.

    Shane purposely drops a barbell on Jack's foot.

    Shane takes Jack's bait.

    Gigi plans to handle Shane's bully herself.

    The bullying ends in tragedy, oh yeah, doesn't Shane and Jack ALSO have the same rare blood type as Matthew and Clint?Hmm. That's some city.

    A college intern named Baz appears on the scene.

    Yvette will arrive in Llanview with a surprising connection to one of its residents.

    Baz is connected to Yvette.

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  2. Man, I should edit before I post. I meant, don't shane and jack. And I should have deleted some stuff that I think just happened. Harumph! Oh well. Mari-Ella's the best, the rest - no contest! Woot! Woot! Woot! :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. @Richmond Chandler you sweet and hilarious thing you! Wait are these spoilers from soaps.com. I have actually seen them. Oh...and no need to edit, darling. I understood what you meant. OMG...I am NOT the best but thank you so much for the compliments. You make me laugh....thanks! xx

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