Toad: "Dammit, if John McBain wasn't drunk as shit he could have prevented me from being shot. What a dipshit."
Happy Sunday! I feel better...yay! I have also successfully passed on my sickness to Ross. Great. He will milk this situation for all it's worth...ugh. Anyway, Friday's episode was good so let's discuss it.
I know that Toad got shot today, but I must say it was Dorian Lord that stole the show today. More on Dorian in a second. So...I have no effing clue who is trying to shoot Toad. Someone connected to Tomas? God, how awesome would it be if it was someone that the REAL TODD MANNING hired to go after fake Toad?! It would be too good to be true, actually. Then Real Todd could expose fake Toad/Walker to everyone. Anyway, these scenes were so staged looking. Wait...the more I watch these the more I realize these scenes are effing heinous. Hold the damn phone! Shouldn't John McBain be drunk?! No wonder Todd ended up getting shot...McBain is probably wasted on Jim Daniels right now and can't get in a decent shot. I'm pretty sure my childhood games of cops and robbers were much more realistic.
Is Charlie a useless bastard or what?! Dorian pretty much let him know it too. "Cool watch. Last time I saw it was on Echo's wrist." Nice, Mayor Lord. OMG! Charlie explode on command because I hate you! Also, granted I love Dorian and Vicki at each other's throats but I thought it was sweet that Dorian told Charlie what a fine and honorable woman Vicki is. Hell, even Dorian notices it! Charlie doesn't and would rather be getting it on with his Atlantic City lover. Don't you dare talk about Echo like that?! Is that what you said Charlie!?!? Sonofabitch!!!! You're making me papercut myself! Wait...has anyone seen the French puppet show "Punch and Judy?" Well, I want to BEAT THE SHIT out of Charlie like Judy does to punch....with a 2x4...repeatedly. Then Charlie continues to defend Echo...f*@k me. This is terrible. Yes...Dorian gave Chuckles an ultimatum. SOMEONE needs to, Charlie! Charlie is now officially more stupid than Joey and he grates on my nerves more...so over this tool/no-talent ass clown. Of course...Charlie is going to see Echo...woof. YES! Dorian is just gonna hang out and read a magazine after she threatened Charlie. She is so cool.
Echo and Gigi...eh, I dunno about these two. I think Gigi just makes all scenes awkward. Maybe I'm staring at her hair the whole time? I dunno. It is indeed another life form. So it's like 3 people in the scenes. Oh, and it's TOTAL HORSESHIT that Gigi gets to live in the carriage house for FREE! It's nicer than most people's houses in Llanview. Total crock! The more they show the carriage house the more outraged I become!
My God...is it the Apocolypse?! I am liking Robert Ford. Excuse me, Mr. Ford, according to Vickster. AND...he is coming closer to redemption in my eyes by the minute. DAMMIT! Oh, for clarification, I STILL want the rest of his family gone and my mind will NOT be changing on that one. Just so you know. Tess needs her own show...fact. I'm gonna be devastated when Jessica returns. Woof. Love how she calls Vicki either Vick or Vickster. This Mr. Ford business is too funny! OMG and now Tess telling Tea she's back from the dead and the rock on Tea's hand...LOVE it! This bitch is too f*@$kin funny! "The man should already be in jail. How are you going to stop him?" GOSH...YES Mr. Ford! Good point! Yeah, I'm liking you. This is effing absurd...but I'm liking you. When he told Clint that it sucks to be him I must say that I thoroughly enjoyed it. Seal the scene with "See Ya in Court Bitches!" Yeah...those were great.
I like the Clint/Tea/Vickster scenes. Awe...tear. When I see Vicki and Clint standing together as a united front in Mr. Ford's apartment, it kinda makes me want them together. They look so damn attractive and regal together. Tea is so badass..."You are not going to get a better offer." Maybe a bunch of $$$ is a better offer. Or, a better offer is staying married to Tess so Lang will get on a jet plane to the west coast for her...wait for it....movie deal. hehehe Oh....poor Vicki. Her pleas to Ford broke my heart!
That random attorney is terrible! He is as bad as those cops in the courtroom. The acting is shit. The look he gave when he left Ford's apartment was hilarious.
Poor Langston. NOT.
Wait....this is HILARIOUS!!!!! James is saying how he thinks about being with Hope and how he kinda loves her. Then Starr says "Yeah, she's hard not to [love]." hahaha! The reason she is so easy for you to love Starr is because you are NEVER EVER with her, you terrible mother! Poor Addie is there for all the whining and crying and diaper changes! You only tote her on your hip once a month or bring her along for company when you get kidnapped and placed in an attic! Sooo...I'm sure the child is fabulous in your eyes and is ALWAYS cute! FAIL, OLTL! Ugh! Yeah...I def think James is gay. I'm hoping it's true.
Gigi, John can't help you because he is drunk!!!! Don't trust him! Listen to your hair! I think it's telling you to not trust John. I thought I heard it talk. Seriously.
Can I please fly to Llanview and hug Vicki? Poor baby. She needs her husband right now and that bastard is making out in the carriage house. Woof. Then the little darling walks in and, of course, someone is just hanging out in her house! This woman never gets any privacy. Llanfair is Grand Central!!! I'd HATE to live there because I'd be scared I'd be kidnapped at any moment.
Charlie/Echo makeout. Ewwww.
So, I'm assuming that Bo's room is just a variation of the cabanas back in Llanview? Or...Marty Saybrooke's house? Thank God he is still in that suit for one more day...le sigh. On another note, Rex still looks like a lavendar douchebag in that shirt. Calling David an international star...hilarious. Damn...my heart kinda warmed when the guard told Bo that David talked about Pa all the time. Awe. Oh wait...I have a feeling that we are about to get an Alex mention....maybe. Siberia? Russia? Romanoff? Olanov?!?!?! That was the name! YES!!!!! Be still my heart!!!!!!! St. Blazes...God, haven't heard that in years.
Woo hoo!!!!! Clint just said "thanks Alex!"
Ok...so in honor of Alex's mini return on Tuesday, I'm gonna post a few youtube clips of her fabulousness. Back when she was with Asa and changed the name of the mansion to "Alexandria" and wanted the Egyptian themed wedding. Awesomeness! I have a feeling only a few people will appreciate this goodness. This was when the show was so AWESOME! Miss those days. Not to mention, original Clint and Cord are in these scenes and a very young Nigel. ;)
Alex Invites Nora to dinner http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mAktHrlozNE
Alex and Asa's Dinner Party 1 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rn_IxGCsZjo&feature=related
Alex and Asa's Dinner Party 2 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzMvBS8AA00&feature=related
Alex and Asa's Dinner Party 3 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9eBE6pT79w&feature=related
See you darlings tomorrow!