Heart Times for Clint and Rex...

Rex: Soooo...do I look good being a Buchanan? I'll go on and answer that for you...no. I look atrosh in this cowboy hat. However, I'd like my Pa to be nicer to me. Oh, and I want a pony. K, thanks.

Goooooooood Evening! I feel I've been away from all of you for so long. Ok, so as y'all know I have a lot going on at the moment. Between daily stuff here, Ross' family situation, and my wedding that is less than 2 months away, and every little thing between...I'm a tad stressed. The past few days have been hectic, and OLTL watching has suffered! Thankfully, I am somehow friends with amazing people and MH's fabulous ass offered to help me today. What a doll! She is beyond wonderful and I'm forever thankful.

Soooooo, I am going to blog about Tuesday's show now. MH is typing about Wednesday's show. Our posts will be posted at the same time in the correct order...as 2 separate posts. So...first mine then MH's. Got it?

Thank y'all for being so understanding! Y'all are wonderful.

Tuesday, June 21st--Stressed and Crazed Mary-Ella's Incoherent Thoughts

Again...that coat needs to be in my closet, Jessica! Not on you! It really would look better on me with my eyes, hair, and skin tone. ;) Kidding, but not really. I just want the damn coat.

I LOATHE this guy in the white shirt!!!! He SUCKS GIANT FAT WIDE ASS!

Ummm yeah Blair...you just got shut down by Tomas' wife. Word yo.

Who wants to throw NuJack into oncoming traffic besides me?

I mean...Vicki has had so much heartache! I know I will not be able to deal with her fabulousness today.

Sonofabitch...look...y'all know I LURVE Clint Buchanan with all my heart but he is being a cold hearted bastard to Rex. I'll still like Clint regardless, but I would just prefer it if he softened a bit. Aaaand Clint is right I think about Rex not having a say in what happens to Gigi's heart. Rex isn't married to Gigi, so he really probably has no say in what happens. I think. Clint is being cold and heartless like J.R. Ewing! Does ANYONE watch "Dallas?" No...take it back. Has anyone ever seen it? Clint is so reminding me of him right now!

I don't care about the Ford/Jess scenes.

Dear OLTL...please get rid of all these f*@king new characters!!! Is this "The Exorcist" because y'all are making my head spin!!! There is a new character everywhere I turn. MONUMENTAL FAIL.

Also...who gives a damn that Starr's music got taken off her ipod...excuse me, mp3 player? Exactly. These scenes make me want to break my wine glass Marty Saybrooke style and slit my throat. Thank God I am drinking tonight!

God...is it just me or are the days and nights in Llanview longer than they used to be?! It's crazy really. I mean...these people are in the same clothes for weeks...months! ;)

God more Ben Davidson references. Victoria: I'm still a tad upset with you for letting Natty do whatevs.

LOL...Clint is telling Rex to learn the legal system? Come on. Nora didn't teach you that much about law when y'all were together. Please. LOL. FACT: Clint's bed got smaller from the previous episode!

Wait...so I'm guessing Ford just walked into Llanfair? Vicki ain't there...neither is Nat. Aubs let him in maybe?

Oh God...I will NOT be able to deal with this Vicki/Gigi shit. Omigod...Erika Slezak is FABULOUS! I cannot deal with her speech to Gigi. God Bless.

Wait...I shouldn't laugh but I'm laughing about Rex trying to smother Clint. I think Clint could swat Rex once to get him off. Awesome...first thing you've done right all week, Natty. Thankfully you walked in...must be those CSU instincts! You just KNEW something was wrong, right?

Oh...for the love of St. Ann's, Tea. GET OUT OF THAT DRESS YOU SHOULD BE WEARING IN LIKE...I DUNNO...NOVEMBER.

I mean...so y'all really mean to tell me that Starr Manning has an mp3 and NOT an ipod? REALLY?! With all that Cramer and Manning money? What a joke. Another joke: WVNB...no, not a news station. That stands for "white v-neck boy." Or..."bastard" instead of "boy."

I mean...I lost interest in this Tomas/Blair stuff like last month. Totally sad on multiple levels because there was so much potential. This storyline has gone down horribly...like an inexperienced hooker.

I'm not even watching Starr or WVNB...I'm more interested in the "Party Munch" in the vending machine.

I mean...Blair is dumb as a box of rocks. This show makes her look so effing stupid in the testosterone department.

I mean...NuJack is also getting paid to say practically nothing, too. Only John is talking...

Rex...you can't heart block, Clint. OMG...an effing Jared reference! I LOVED Jared! I'm sorry. I'm like Renee Divine...LURVED him! Couldn't help my damn self!

Aaaaaand, Gigi was paying rent? Glad I'm finding that out now. Good God Almighty! Vicki is some angel on earth...right? She put Gigi's tips from Rodi's in a college fund? Mercy! Oh, I would like a pendant with Saint Victoria on the front with some cool phrase. I'd wear that shit everyday. She is the shit. Vicki would protect me every damn day! St. Christopher who?

Wait...is that new fish shit on the wall in the nursery? Awe...Jess just said "My Uncle Bo and Aunt Nora." How cute. Where are they? Depressed without them. God...Jessica is such a mess. I don't know what else to say.

God...I don't know what to say about Natalie and to be honest I don't know how I feel about what she spouted off to Clint about how he can't end Gigi's life. I need to think about this...

Ugh...I don't like these Gigi scenes I think because I think all these hospital scenes are just hitting a bit too close to home nowadays. Just boo.

I want to know if John plays darts and if he shots hoops...that mini b-ball goal above the dartboard is calling my name.

My God! These Starr/WVNB scenes are all ate up with shit! It's like a virus! The Mestiny Epidemic!

Blair...don't act shocked Yvette (sp?) cheated on Tomas and had another man's baby. That is like a fav pasttime in Llanview. Word.

I'd lke to just say that I am so thankful I'm drinking. Otherwise I couldn't mentally handle the show today. Omigod...this episode is dripping in a Mestiny virus! God bless...I'll need to go to the ER after watching!

Ugh...so WVNB is gonna be Tomas' son? KILL ME! I'll have the filet o' woof with shit sauce and I'd like Mes to be my server...all while I watch the Starr/WVNB scenes. A typical day in hell...cue the visual

Where is Dorian? She is leaving the show soon and she ain't on...FAIL.

There is no way NuJack went to acting school and if he did then the school needs to shut down.

Can Vicki be my mother please? I just want her to love on me. K, thanks.

I can't believe I'm saying this but good for Natalie for telling Clint what's up. I strive for objectivity about 75% of the time!!!! Dammit! She deserved the credit!

Jesus, Mary, and St. Ann's....Vicki is the most selfless woman on the planet. OF COURSE you will be there for Rex...you're fabulous.

I still can't get over the fingernail polish shit with Jessica. Sooooo she just ran in the bathroom the other day and removed the black polish and then painted them green to match the jacket. Gotta give her props...

Tea...I'm starting to like you a LOT. The day FINALLY came. Soooo...I need you to NOT ardently defend NuJack. That would suck. Can't deal, darling. Cannot deal.

The security at Llanfair and at Mayor Vickers' (Akesha! Thank you!!! Love that name!) house is effing nonexistent. Mayor Vickers...lurve it.

Ugh. FAIL. I mean REALLY?!?! WVNB is gonna be Tomas and Yvette's kid and he OF COURSE is gonna befriend Starr at LU? This is embarassing. Like falling on your ass in front of a lot of people embarassing...

Baz. ATROSH name! I'd rather be called "truck stop whore" than "Baz."

Wait...Rex just called Tea "Mrs. Manning" and I swear I can't remember her ever being called that. Good for Rex, though. He is being protective of Gigi. So proud.

I like need Vickster and Silver Fox together now. I don't want to see Baz and Yaz (whatever her name is...Yvette? I like Yaz better. Like the birth control.), because I need some vet time.

Awe...Rex wants to go on and marry Gigi. Tear.

Lordy! Ok...again, thanks for understanding my crazy schedule! My blog probably makes about 60% sense...mercy!

Loving you all and meaning it! Thanks so much!

infinite xo,

Mija (for now...Marty might be taking over my body at this rate! Crazy week!)