Rex and Roxy: "No Shane, it's okay. This really is 'One Life to Live.' You're not on the wrong show. It's just a bit confusing since it feels like it's 'General Hospital' lately."
Helloooooo!!!!!! Ah! Happy to type this to y'all! No, I didn't forget about y'all. Just now getting a chance to sit down and watch the show from Thursday and Friday. Oh, and Happy Father's Day...but I'm not sure how many fathers read this blog. My guess is practically zero. Oh well. So...I'm gonna do a crazy, frantic, Marty post of Thursday's episode...then one for Friday. Okie dokie. Oh...and for the life of me I tried to find a pic of Gigi from this week but couldn't. Huge woof. And Ross isn't here to do the still shot. =(
Thursday, June 16th--Frantic Marty's Observations
1. I'm watching the Soapnet version since that penis interrupted the ABC version. I mean...as if that was effing necessary. Plus, like I really need to hear the ABC News reporters give their f*@king take on a penis resigning. The world is going to shit.
2. I want to know the last time the sheets were washed at the Minuteman.
3. Natalie looks miserable in the bed with Brody...like she just ate bad food and now has to go to the bathroom.
4. I have no words for Rama's foot massage orgasm.
5. I don't like Cutter but I love his suit and he is rocking it like a Brooks Brothers model...from the neck down. BB would never have a scruffy model like that.
6. Every time I see Vimal I instantly think "that poor bastard." It never fails.
7. Y'all know Christian is leaving the show early right? Do y'all care? My thoughts exactly. Oh, and I don't give two shit about Chris and Rama. Waste of my time and the show.
8. Mes is the BIGGEST f*@king spaz of all time. More so than Rex. I can also say that I wet my pants when she ran out of Matthew's room asking for a doctor. WORST ACTING EVER.
9. The depth of my anger, rage, and frustration for Mes being all up in Bo and Nora's business cannot be put into words. This shit is making me violent and I am NOT a violent person.
10. It's ABSURD how many Llanview residents are in the hospital right now!!! ABSURD. Seriously. This show should be called General Hospital. Ugh...I loathe GH. Can't lie.
11. Natty, Brody and Liam in that bed...edible. Adorbs. Presh. Cannot deal. Too bad it won't last and Brody will no doubt lose his marbles like the good St. Ann's alum he is.
12. I want Toad to just kill NuJack. Like right now. And, I need Tea out of that damn dress.
13. Gigi's make-up is still PERFECT!!!!!
14. I CANNOT BELIEVE HOW UPSET I AM WITH THESE REX/GIGI SCENES!!! Heartbreaking. So sad. And such a sad way to die. JPL is rocking it.
15. The best part of the show for me was Matt squeezing Nora's hand. Of course, the penis annoucement barred it on ABC. Thank you soapnet.
16. I can't really concentrate on these adorbs Natty, Brody, and Liam scenes because I'm mesmerized by Natty's awesome boobs. Word.
17. LOL...Shawn/Sean is so much larger than Bo.
18. Rex talking to Gigi is killing me. Sadness overload. OMG! Then he got in the bed with her...dying from sadness!
19. OMG...someone kill me. I'm even willing to go out horribly like Jen Rappaport if I have to be subjected to this Tess/Jess shit again. I'm beyond over it. Make up your effing mind! This has gone on long enough!!!!! Vain observation: the kelly green coat is dripping in adorableness.
20. I'm pretty sure the charges against NuJack get dropped...shitastic to the max.
Friday, June 17th--Marty Won't Shut Up. She Wants to Discuss Friday, Too!
1. Jessica's coat...I MUST HAVE IT!!! I'm such a coat whore!!!! Hand it over, bitch!
2. OMG...without a doubt these Clint/Vicki/Bo scenes will be the showstopper for me. My heart literally skips beats when Bo lights up and gushes about Nora...ah! Speaking of...where is she? Fail. If she has to be absent, I hope she is removing Mes from Matt's life. Whatever means necessary.
3. Clint's doctor is the only one I like out of this motley crew. The others are dripping in stupidity and awkwardness.
4. That's right Roxy...Gigi DOES look perfect. Not a damn hair out of place. I hope I look that good when I leave this world. Word.
5. It's comforting to know that Blair drinks almost as much wine as I do. On another note, I will hate that RH will prob just spy on Blair all episode. That'll be just f*@kin' awesome.
6. Bo and Clint interacting and getting along decently well...MAKING MY DAY!
7. Again, Rex talking to Gigi is killing me!
8. I mean...UNBELIEVABLE. So....Clint, Matthew AND Gigi are ALL B-?! No. Just no.
9. Awe...Bo this Clint stuff breaks my heart, too. You sweet thing.
10. I want to get into these Natty/Brody/Jess scenes but I can't. For one, I keep looking at Jessica's coat. Plus, I'm kinda tired of all this. Jess needs to either be Tess or Jess and Brody needs to just go on and go crazy (since sadly he and Natty ain't gonna work out) and I need the truth about McBundle to just come on out. This story is dragging fat ass.
11. I'm yawning during these Ford/Cutter scenes. I'd like to have a drink to get through them but it is too early. Le sigh.
12. Poor Clint's feet are hanging off the bed. I mean...he is sitting up! Can you imagine him lying completely down?! His knees would be off! OMG...these Vicki/Clint scenes are ADORBS! I'm so ready for them to get back together that I don't even know what to do with myself.
13. OMG...Rex telling Bo about Gigi's ordeal. Just break my heart why don't you.
14. Now Vicki and Clint looking through photo albums?! Cuteness overload. Whoa...Joey surfaces 20 minutes in? REALLY?! I love that Vicki hit Clint and said "see?!" So presh.
15. God...Natalie is getting on my last nerve this episode. I'm sorry. On another note...she looks fabu in her post-sex romp robe. Brody is the coolest person in these scenes. Fact.
16. These Starr/Blair scenes are filet o' woof covered in shit sauce. Le barf.
17. I'm so tired of Blair lamenting over her love life.
18. Aaaaaand, where is Renee while all this foolishness is taking place in the living room. Just a big f*@k you...thanks writers. Don't even get me started on no Renee/Clint stuff!!! Don't even!
19. Brody is spot on with everything he is saying. Jessica has been on for all of one hot minute and I'm over her ass already.
20. Holy shit! Bree!! I'll be damned. Whoa! Aubs surfaced 40 minutes in? What is going on?
21. HOLY HELL! So between Brody and Natty's room and the nursery Jessica took off her black finger nail polish and then painted her nails green?!?! haha! Priorities, obviously. That was a "whoopsie" OLTL.
22. Rex/Shane...no words. This is just so heartbreaking. Great job by them, though....for shizzle. Roxy in the background was fabu, too.
23. Is Rama a lawyer? LOL. She was telling Cutter where to sign and everything...ha!
24. I'm VERY interested in all this Rex/Clint fallout about the heart. This will be good.
25. God...Rex and Shane are killing me. On another note...Gigi's doctor sucks HUGE donkey balls.
26. Man, OLTL had to pay RH for this episode and he didn't even effing talk. Unreal. I'd love to know how many actual words he has spoken since his return...
27. MH, you're right...that is indeed a new Ryder!
28. Lordy...now Bo has to break the news about Gigi to Vicki. Poor V. When V said "Omigod" I felt her shock!
29. OMG...Shane just said "mommy." God, I need Zoloft after this episode.
30. Natty...just zip it. You have made too many errors today.
31. I still can't help but rejoice for good ole Clint. I'm so glad the Silver Fox is going to live.
32. Lord...I mean does Dorian have ANY SECURITY at her house?! UNREAL! She is the mayor for crying out loud and ALWAYS has bodyguards. Yet strangers are all over her damn yard. It's as bad as Llanfair!
Whew...Pooped! See y'all tomorrow! I'll respond to comments at some point, too. Off for a run.
Loving you all!