Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Main Reason to Stay in Llanview: ONLY If You Get to BE DJ at Capricorn. Word, Yo.

Christian: "Brody, I can't talk right now dude. I need to hear Baz's last jam and then I need to go and find a new teaching assistant for my art class. I'm a little busy."

Oooookay. Second glass of wine poured and Lola is being worthless on the couch next to me...looks like I'm ready for post #2 of the evening!

Wednesday, June 29th--Christian Vega's Magical Adventure (do NOT ask me where that came from. I just thought I'd throw Christian in the mix since I give him a hard time so this can be his adventure through Llanview.)

1. OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! No! No! No! No! No! Is this an effing nightmare?! Yes, it is. Satan himself has dragged my ass to hell! I am so certain! Am I REALLY going to have to be subjected to Baz being the mother f*@king dj at Capricorn?! See if Christian were narrating this he would say the same thing! Word.
2. F*@k. See MH and I thought we reserved our seats in hell together, row 2 seats 6 and 7 respectively. Now, I know things are screwed up because now I have to sit and watch Mes' ass talk to Matthew while I am all alone! Things are not going as planned. I mean...she pulled out the effing test!? REALLY?! Just keep that shit in your purse! I want Matthew to wake up and slap the test out of her hand and be like "Bitch, have you lost your damn mind?! My parents could walk in!" Probably not, because God forbid Bo and Nora be on together being cool. Another tangent. Anyway...You are so stupid, Mes. I'm about to gulp this wine, I swear. This episode has to improve or I'll LOSE WHAT LITTLE OF MY SANITY I HAVE LEFT!
3. Awe...Gigi's belongings. Now that really is sad...seriously. OH SNAP. The tape recorder. I'm so glad that Brody will finally play it since everyone else just carried it around like a damn wallet. Fail.
4. Dear God. Now Ford?
5. I mean...I don't like Jessica either but I was sick of the Tess shit so I don't know what to think about this broad. I know that she has no business getting custory of her children but that's neither here nor there.
6. Poor Shane and Rex. I'll probably be upset this episode. No doubt.
7. What did you say Starr? The only reason Baz came to Llanview is because Blair said he could work on his music at Capricorn? PUH-LEEZE! God...Blair and Starr are just stupid. I'm not in a good mood for this episode and I'm upset that I'm not happy. Woof. Aaaand now I have to listen to Dayt-en and NQS discuss their porn?! I would effing pay to be Kelly Cramer in John McBain's roach motel bathroom right now...bleeding out from my multiple stab wounds. Seriously. Much better at this rate.
8. No. I can't deal with this Mes/Matt shit. Won't discuss. I'm in John McBain's bathroom bleeding out having one helluva good time so I'll just let y'all imagine would I would say about Mes talking to pink preg test in hand. Balls!
9. AHHHH!!!!!!!!!! Bo! My hero! Seriously. He WILL be my hero this episode. Please save me from this shit show! I will do whatever you want me to...seriously!
10. Wait...I thought that was a smurf card in the background behind Mes but it's not. It is some blue animal though. How ironic if it would have been a smurf? I cannot handle Bo Buchanan's adorableness. Oh wait...nevermind. Bo just told Destiny they were lucky to have her. Say it ain't so, Bo! Please take it back!
11. OMG I can't deal with Shane talking to sad. WAIT JUST A DAMN MINUTE...I need to find out who the hell in Llanview does Gigi's nails! Pristine! Just perfect! When I die, I pray that I look like Gigi. Wait...I think I saw Farah Fath have water come out of her eye...just a little bit.
12. I kinds like it when Jessica popped off to Natalie. But wait...a Bo and Natty scene coming up?! I'm excited about this.
13. When is the last time we saw the evidence room? I can't think when.
14. Awe lawd...come on Vicki. Yes, you ARE defending Natalie and Brody. Eh...eff. I guess I agree with Vicki. They didn't really mean to hurt Jessica. Woof. She is right. As usual.
15. I mean...have we had a Natty/Bo scene since the Eli Clarke warehouse fiasco? Oh well...nevermind. That scene was 2 seconds. Probably longer than Matthew Buchanan lasted with Mes...yes, I went there.
16. normally I'm beyond offended with all the Rex/Bo stuff but today I'm kinda not. Is it absurd that Nora isn't on with Bo? Of course it is. But Bo is being the good guy that he is and that is why I like him to begin I'm ok with this stuff so far. I was expecting worse from what I heard. Grandpa Bo? Hmmm.
17. These Ford/Brody scenes are about as exciting as a colonoscopy. Wait...why is Ford dressed so nice?
18. "I can forgive him for maybe sleeping with her once and having a child with her...maybe..but he slept with her again!" That was like straight out of a Maury Povich show. Ridic.
19. Wait...I'm not enjoying this episode very much. all.
20. Oh snap! Oh snap! (Wait...that just made me think of Fergie's "London Bridge" song. Lame, Mary-Ella. Really lame.) Natty just saw the tape and then Brody is looking at it...shit gonna go down soon. Like an EXPERIENCED prostitute. Word!
21. Hells yes you should have gotten Gigi a ring, Rex! A big one! ;) Well...I just can't handle Rex doing wedding vows to Gigi. I mean...weepyville USA. SAD! Wait...Olympia's ring is AWFUL!!!! If anything Gigi should wake up for THIS and demand it be taken off her finger! That dress does look good on her. I'm tearing up. Sonofabitch.
22. I mean...Mes pregnancy test box is huge and I swear it got bigger with each segment.
23. Sooo...these Capricorn scenes need to be long yet the Echo/Vicki scenes yesterday were for all of a hot minute. Just awesome.
24. I love the collar of Vicki's suit...p.s. The But the neckline is superb.
25. JPL is doing fabulously. I'll give him that. Oh no...they are gonna dance? Oh now I could do without this. All my praising may go out the window soon. Dear God...I'm upset during all this. I did NOT expect this!
26. Look! There's Ross Rayburn on the Cymbalta commercial!
27. OMG...RIGHT NOW would be the PUUUUURRRRRFECT time for Marty Saybrooke to come and take out everyone at Capricorn. All of the shit characters are there under one roof! Marty! Marty! Marty!
28. I mean...Natalie, just be honest with Vickster. You love John, yet you get horny and like to do Brody. Bonus...y'all look adorbs as a little family but we all know that ain't happening. So just tell Vicki that he is your f*@k buddy until John comes back in your world. You need to start telling the truth, girlfriend. I that I think about it Vicki is just totally ok with all this sex going on at Llanfair. Hmmm.
29. I forgot how weak, self-righteous, and puppy-like Jessica is...
30. Well, I just can't handle this Rex and Gigi stuff...sadness overload.
31. Tess gonna come back out? Woof.
32. This party at Capricorn is LAME AS HELL! why do Starr and James get to have a main dance at this party. It's not even their effing graduation. I do like Dayt-en's top. Can't lie. UGH!!!!!!! I'm so tired of seeing that hot pink preg test! MES YOU ARE INFECTING MY LIFE!!!! Seriously!
33. Awe...I at least get to see my Bo again. You don't even have to say's ok I understand.
34. I mean REALLY?! I many disguises has Ford had? Or costumes? A hot dog? A habit? A St. Anne's guard? Now he is taking a page from the Eli Clark playbook and being a doctor? This is just a shit show.
35. Poor Rex and Shane. At least Gigi had a good exit. However, I think we are gonna be seeing more of her supposedly.
36. Oh, and I'm not gonna discuss this now but I got so damn excited when I saw that Erin effing Torpey was coming back to OLTL but to NOT play Jessica. Ugh. I need to read more into this. Le sigh.

Eh...I would love for tomorrow's episode to be better. The teens were just effing heinous and I can't deal with them or their foolishness!!!!

Ok I'm headed for bed. So glad to be back! See y'all tomorrow night! I plan to blog in the evening!

Loving you all and meaning it!

kiss kiss,
Christian Vega's muse, Mija.


  1. Could NOT stop crying this episode--POOR Shane, POOR REX and OMG GIGI and Rex and the dancing--it was too much LOVED IT! That is soap opera at it's best. But to interject those disgusting Ford Brothers into it and the yuckster teens ruined what could have been a most FABU show. We should have seen scenes of Clint being prepped with sad music as Rex and gigi said goodbye, Buchs in tears of joy and sadness--- NOT BAZ, Fords or Manning sibs.


    And I just want jessica to die--she shouldn't have her children she doesn't deserve Brody only resurrecting Nash will save this character

  2. @rac The Gigi, Shane, Rex stuff was pretty sad...can't lie. The dancing...I thought it would be cheesy but it was genuinely sad! Lord have mercy. Very sweet. Very. Yes...I know I said in my post that overall I didn't really care for the show and it's for the EXACT reasons you just said. The scenes at Capricorn were heinous and insulting...Mes and the Pink Preg Test (can't even go there)...Ford and Brody just woof. The Rex/Gigi/Shane stuff plus the Vicki stuff plus Bo could have been all kinds of FABU but was ruined. Totally agree. Yes...the Fords need to all die like last year...literally. I LOL'd at "I just want Jessica to die." She is a terrible character. I'm over her, too. Nash ain't coming back so it looks like we need Marty to come take her out quick...word!

  3. What a dumb episode!

    And that stupid tape recorder is pissing me off! What kind of police station is this? You don't get evidence like a tape every day, and thats not the first thing you listen to! WTH! If I was a cop, I'd be like "Hey maybe Gigi told us what happened on this tape, maybe I should listen to it", because that's what she planned to do! OMFG! At least thats ending this week, so thats good...

    You can get too mad at Mes, she has fallen prey to the same disease that every soap character has, where they repeatedly bring out in public, self-incriminating evidence or confess the secrets out loud, seventeen times a day...They can't help it!

    LOL and I was totally thinking the same thing about Ford! I just imagine him at a Halloween costume shop, "I want this one, and that one...and that lacy one that butttons up down the back"...

  4. @YoSammity Stop! I TOTALLY agree about this tape recorder nonsense! It has gone on for too damn long. Oh well...poor Brody is about to go off the deep end I think so that should be interesting. haha...YES it's ending this week thank God. I hope this shit delivers and is decent. Yes...I can't help but get mad at Mes. I just want to beat her ass and that pregnancy test is HUGE AND BRIGHT PINK! I wish Bo would have heard her. OMG...Ford will have no trouble dressing for Halloween! I mean...NONE! I need to come to his house and try on shit, I swear. hahahahaha!!! the lacy one with the buttons down the back...lurve it!

  5. @YoSammitySam and Mija,

    Yes, they do love to beat a dead horse. don't need a pregnancy test. YOU ALREADY KNOW THE TRUTH! Brody, if you want to keep your job and sanity, ERASE THE TAPE...

    Alas, though these people have lived in Llanview forever, they don't learn from other's we will see Des feeling the need to share ALL of her personal business about the pregnancy test when Starr, DanYELLA, Jack, Sam, or some other random person asks her, "What's this?" Plus we will see Brody sneak some Marty Saybrook sauce to keep the family he always Can I say again, I don't even LIKE Natalie, but I am ready for her and John to get back together so all sorts of tomfoolery can come to an end?

    The good part... Gigi and Rex... so tragic... so well done. So how will Rex v. Todd work once MwS is introduced to the picture?



    Saddd episodeee... Poor Rex & Shane!

    Cant believe Ford is "kidnapping" Jessica, who is acting rather Tessish lately.

  7. @Akesha Timeout...didn't it used to say your name when you posted? Or am I dreaming and it has always been "anonymous?" Anyway...I'm about to bop the shit out of Mes. I hate that the preg test is hot pink, p.s. We all know Brody ain't erasing the tape and he will plummet over the edge after hearing the news. You are soooo right about Mes spreading her pregs news to every effing teen in the damn state of Pennsylvania. I think Brody will borrow Marty's sauce for sure and all hell will break loose! OMG total agreement about Natty. This story has been DRAGGING ASS and it feels like it's been going on for years. I'm not a Jolie fan but we know they are getting back together so just do the damn thing already. I agree about the Gigi and Rex stuff being well done. I must say I'm surprised but it was a pleasant one. I have no idea how this Rex v. Todd thing is gonna in the dark about all things Todd related.

    @ashleebradford5 So funny...there is a girl from my town named "Ashley Bradford." Anyway...AGREE ABOUT THE DAMN TAPE! Jesus H. Christ! Everyone has just been toting the damn thing around and it just gets passed to someone else...enough already! was sad for poor Rex and Shane. I was impressed by the yet for them. Ugh...I'm so over Ford and Jess/Tess whatever the hell you want to call her. Jessica has had a 'tude with Brody so that is kinda Tessish, huh? good point! I'm kinda over her, unfortunately.

  8. I watch the SoapNetwork and Farrah says if she wasnt an actress, she'd be a makeup artist b/c that's her passion....She does her own makeup for the show, which most likely includes her nails. I'd hire her!!
    Love your posts, btw!!
    S. Banks

  9. @S. Banks Well that ho can come do my makeup and hair on a daily basis! I'm looking for a new stylist. ;) Seriously she looks all kinds of fabu on life support...mercy! Her nails were just perfection! glad you like my posts, darling. Thank you! Happy 4th!