Happy Weekend, my fellow One Life to Live fans!
You may be asking yourselves, “Why ‘Mixed Emotions’ for today’s title, Mary Heather?” Stay tuned!!
Friday’s episode was flipping fantastic! A drastic improvement of last Friday’s episode and, let’s be honest, of this week’s episodes in general. I am so excited to be posting in Mary Ella’s absence. We all envy her mini vacay to the beach, FACT, but girlfriend deserves it!!
Before I discuss all things OLTL, let me just express my appreciation to ME for maintaining this wonderfully entertaining blog on a daily basis. It takes such dedication to post every day with her hectic schedule, so major props to ME for her efforts!! Love you to Della Reeses Pieces, ME!!!! Kisses, MH!!
I will delve into Friday’s fabulous show in just a few, but I would be remiss if I did not discuss the absolutely heartbreaking cancellation news of Thursday. Here is where today’s title comes into play! While I am totally pumped up about Friday’s episode and about the upcoming fallout of certain storylines, I am sick to my stomach that these will be the final storylines for my favorite characters and actors. “Mixed Emotions” – FACT!! I will TRY and be brief with my thoughts because I know that ME will discuss this when she returns. In my humble opinion, talking about our feelings in the face of tragedy can be therapeutic, so here are a few of mine. Sidenote: ME and I are creepily similar in our whit and irreverence and in our thoughts on the show! Just something for you to keep in mind while reading!!
First of all, I grew up on soaps – I am now 29 years old, so I started watching at a rather young age. Did you hear that, Brian Frons and ABC? I am a member of your most important target demographic, and I would most emphatically rather watch a soap opera than watch yet another talk or reality show. Where the hell was my survey? By the way, thanks for the fabulous 30th birthday gift you will be giving me in January! Oh, and newsflash: talk and reality shows are neither new nor groundbreaking. Woof… just woof!
Woah, I got off task already! Sorry for that outburst! Where was I? Ah yes! My grandmother and my aunts on my mother’s side are responsible for my love of the soaps in general. They were avid As the World Turns and Guiding Light fans, and I picked up on Guiding Light. One Life to Live was added to our afternoon line-up somewhere along the line, and the rest, as they say, is history. I was a complete basket case when GL ended, and I am certain I will be worse when OLTL leaves us in January. Thankfully, I was home when the cancellation news broke, and I did, indeed, shed a few tears. While I honestly saw this coming, I am still in shock and have not yet fully processed the news. I could write a dissertation (which I might if I ever take the plunge into grad school again to get a doctorate degree) on why I think this is all happening, I will refrain because I don’t want to bore you all to tears… well, any more than I already am!
Another thought that I will share with you all on this cancellation travesty is the manner in which it is being handled by ABC Daytime and Brian Frons in particular. My background and master’s degree is in Communication, specifically public relations. Like any of you give a rat’s ass; however, I tell you this for the following reason. One of the most, if not THE most important, thing to remember in public relations practice is that in crisis situations our first and foremost concern should be on those directly affected by the crisis. Yes, I am calling these soap cancellations crisis situations because, let’s face it, that is exactly what this is for our beloved genre of television. Brian Frons obviously has never taken a communication class in his life (or failed the class if he did… or better yet, took a communication course on the art and practice of lying and bull shitting) because his handling of this news has been, quite frankly, abominable. I know this sounds mean, but it my honest opinion.
Among other public relations violations, Mr. Frons showed no concern for the actors who have dedicated their careers to these shows, the behind the scenes workers who will lose their jobs and livelihoods, and the fans who have supported these shows through think and thin throughout the years. In his official press release, his mention of the shows was basically an afterthought (much like Bo and Nora’s second first love scene… but I digress – that was a reference for ME!!). Rather than follow the above-mentioned PR guideline, he notified a handful of the parties affected via a pre-taped video message and is now running amuck making idiotic remarks like, “I pre-joined the witness protection program.” Not funny, Mr. Frons, not funny at all. Period! End of sentence! If you have not seen his full statement, I encourage you to check it out via any one of the soap sites, but I warn you, have your barf bag handy!
Finally, I extend my most heartfelt appreciation to and commend the actors of OLTL for their reactions to the cancellation news. As the news broke, many actors took to Facebook and Twitter to express their appreciation to the fans for their dedication, loyalty, and support to and for them and for the show. I know this is true of the All My Children actors as well. While I am sure each of them was devastated, they showed incredible composure, professionalism, and strength in taking the time to reach out to their fans, and that just speaks volumes of not only their personal characters but also of the soap genre in general, in my opinion. Ok, I am getting emotional again, and you all have probably tuned this all out, so I am stopping now!
All righty, now that you all are bored out of your minds with my mindless blabbering and are, as we speak, writing ME messages asking that she never let me write this blog for her again, let me go refill my mimosa, and we will get to the happy side of this post: Let’s get this One Life to Live Friday, April 15, 2011 episode posting party started. Sidenote: Just so you know, I do have a life, but I am just having a low-key weekend at home in Texas in anticipation of the chaos that will be next weekend’s Easter festivities back in Louisiana with my family!
Aaaaand we are off to a rolling start, ladies (and perhaps gentleman) – bad ass Clint has decided to pay a visit to his son that he refuses to claim to check on his grandson Shane! Snap, Rex tries to slam the door in his face! Word!
SAY WHAT? Rewind!! Is that my Bo Buchanan? Holler!! What is up, Bo? Haven’t seen your ass (or Nora’s or Matthew’s, for that matter) in over a week! Whatcha been up to all day, the day after Matthew’s murder confession? I could speculate, but I will spare you all!! Snap, Nora is typical hysterical Nora! YES!!! Matthew has disappeared, and she cannot find him. Uh, really, Nora? Like there were a shit –ton of places to look. Like that god-forsaken garret is that big. I mean really, how many effing rooms are there to look through in that place? Matthew’s room, their room, the kitchen, the living room, the balcony, and hell, the three of them probably share a damn bathroom. Sheesh!
Lord have mercy, Wendy Williams is back with this Access Llanview foolishness. Oh, hey, Destiny! Girlfriend is having a whole Karaoke party in the Buenos Dias Café to the theme song of this show. I wonder if she is singing from the “Closed Captioned” subtitles on the television screen or if she has the theme memorized! I think the latter! “Phyllis knows, Phyllis knows, the secret that you’re hiding”… Well, I have no words! Let’s just say, that this song will not be added to my Karaoke line-up any time soon! Oh, and, hey Matthew! Join Destiny in her Karaoke party!! It will take your mind off of your committing murder.
OMG – Rama is now having a Karaoke party in the study of the Buch manze to this Access Llanview theme song! This girl cracks my ass up! Stop it, so Nigel is going to watch it with her! She yells for him to hurry up, and he comes running in there with a bowl of popcorn!! I am peeing on myself already!! TIMES, so ya’ll know that the furniture in the study HAS to come from somewhere totally chic and faboosh, right?! Why the eff are those two sitting on the coffee table? This enquiring mind wants to know!
How YOU doing, Wendy Williams? Thanks for the Joey Tribianni quote!! Lordy, and thanks, Des, for repeating it. Matthew looks uncomfortable – granted, he should be given the circumstances, but his expressions at Destiny’s quips are cracking me up! Yo, WW/PR, I am not a “duck”. Where the eff did they come up with this “ducks” shit? Just wondering! Oh, and next time I go to a restaurant bar, or regular bar, for that matter, I WISH they would leave the damn remote control lying around for me to use!!
SNAP – Nora is in typical hysterical Nora mode!!! YES, girlfriend is ready to tear up Llanview to find Matthew. Ha – Bo let Matthew go to the diner to meet Des!! Flove Bo – let Matthew go hang out with his friend in the midst of such mayhem! Aaww – he is so Nora’s voice of reason!! I cannot deal with the adorableness that is Bo and Nora – we even get contact, to boot. This bitch is in hog heaven!! Please do figure out what you will do about Matthew, you two! Apparently, you have been otherwise occupied all damn day – Wink, wink!
Mercy – I feel like I will now need to be diagnosed with ADD with all of this back and forth business. Back to Rama and Nigel watching “Access Llanview” in the study. Sidenote: Perhaps Rene’ has been totally overhauling that backyard that we can see from the living room of the manze because we haven’t been in that room in over a week! Maybe she took a break from that gin rummy game with Addie to handle this – perhaps Addie is assisting her. Hmmm. One can only dream!
Oh YES, Dorian has arrived – I swear, like Llanfair, the Buch manze must not lock its doors either. PS, I flove that Dorian still refers to Joey as “Joe”! Flove it! And I flove Dorian’s outfit – so chic, so Dorian!! Oh hell no, Rama just shushed Dorian. This will not be good for her ass. HAAAA – Dorian: “Shush THIS! What are you doing watching that dreadful woman?” My question, precisely, Dorian!! Why are we all having to watch this woman? I am peeing on myself!!
Woah, Natalie is washing dishes (bottles). Snap! Is it the maid’s night off? OF COURSE she is watching Phyllis, too. Double woah, Christian is at the door? I guess this is his night off from Capricorn AND teaching classes as a professor at LU? Perhaps? Aaww – he brought Nat a baby gift! I did like these two as a couple back in the day, so how sweet of him to bring her a gift! Still, writers have no clue where to go with Christian – hopefully they get a clue before November! Uh oh, he came with the gift just to give her a heads-up on Marty! Mercy!
Hey, Marty!! You are still Koo Koo for CoCo Puffs, but I love you anyway!! Obviously this is all leading up to Natalie’s baby being John’s. I could go off on this topic, too, but I will spare you all!! And, word, John!! What is Marty doing? One guess, big boy!!
What is Marty up to now, you ask, Nat? Yes, it has something to do with you! This whole thing is so effing obvious, it annoys me!
That is right, John, that piece of paper is serious! Go enjoy your sexcapades with Kelly, cause you’ll be back with Nat in a hot minute once the reveal occurs – Gag me!! Ya’ll guessed it – I am not the biggest John and Nat fan, but I would imagine that they are end game come January, and that makes me happy for John and Nat fans!
No idea why Marty would still be carrying around DNA results, Nat? And you work for the LPD! Hell, you were all over Greg Evans, questioning his ass in the aftermath of the Tea Delgado fake brain tumor/death train wreck like you had been promoted to detective from forensics! Figure it out! Good God, Nat, you ruined your relationship with John by not telling his ass what you did with Brody and that there was the possibility that the baby could be Brody’s! Sick of this – take some responsibility for your actions, girlfriend!! Jesus take the wheel! I am sorry, I deal with my adult students’ lack of personal responsibility every damn day, and it annoys the hell out of me! And, John, wait till you find out that that baby really is yours. Your troubles are just beginning, honey!
HAHAHA – Destiny!! Phyllis was reporting good news? For realizes? Bo and Nora may have dropped the charges, and Clint may be innocent of murder, all right, but his ass is still to blame for plenty of other things. YES, I want a milkshake, too, Matthew! Order me one, please! Sonic Happy Hour doesn’t begin for a while! Thanks!! Yo, waitress! Who muted the TV? A wise person, that’s who!
“C-Daddy,” Phyllis Rose?!?! HAHAHAHA!!!! From here on out, I am referring to Clint as C-Daddy!! That is too funny for words! Sidenote: I flove the photos of Bo and Nora that Phyllis is using on her show! Fab! Oh, snap, PR just called Dorian’s ass out. Well, PR, if Dorian has been asleep at the wheel in the bliss of her new marriage to Vickers-Buchanan, she just woke the hell up. Great, she is going to march her happy self over to Bo and Nora’s and interrupt their angsty cuteness. Woof! It is no laughing matter, Rama, so stop the snickering!
Just stick a fork in me, cause I am done. I just cannot deal with the angsty cuteness that is Bo and Nora during the fallout of this whole Matthew is the killer story. Aagghh – contact for days!! Bo in Bo mode with hysterical Nora! I cannot deal!! That is right, Bo, everything is ok for the moment; however, Dorian is about to interrupt the cuteness of this moment! Eff that!! Holler – alone time!! I flove Bo and Nora alone time! Too bad they are not making the most of their alone time in true Bo and Nora style! Wait - they probably did, but it was off-screen as usual! Shoot me! Uh, I have a suggestion on how to make the most of the alone time, Nora!! Everyone take a guess as to where I am going with this!! Sidenote: I flove Bo and Nora’s casual, dressed down fashions!! Hillary B. Smith has to have on her own damn clothes – FACT!!! That blouse is totally circa 1990s Nora! Hell, the whole outfit is! Fab! And, yes, Nora, C-Daddy did set this all in motion! Thank you! Too bad you will start blaming yourself in a hot minute! Bo, I am counting on you to reassure her, in classic Bo mode, that C-Daddy’s actions are not her fault!!!
HAAAA – I dare Rex to call the police on C-Daddy for trespassing! He ain’t going anywhere, Rex, so you just as well let him say what he has to say! I have to say, as much as I enjoy bad-ass Clint, I am with Rex on this one!! LOL – “Gramps”!! I still like C-Daddy better!!
I am pretty sure C-Daddy is not to blame for this whole Shane bullying thing, but Rex, is right, there is plenty more to blame Clint for! Word!
Gosh – swoon- more Bo and Nora contact! Sheesh, too bad Dorian is about to interrupt their cuteness! Bo is right, C-Daddy is to blame, but he didn’t pull the trigger, Matthew did! I still think there is something off with this whole thing, but I am just going to trust the actors on this one and see how it plays out! OMG – Bo wants to hire a hot-shot lawyer to HELP Nora with a defense for Matthew?! For real? Does this mean that Nora can be a defense attorney again before the show ends? PLEEEEEEEAAAASE?!?!?!? Gosh, this is just totally old school Bo and Nora discussion and cuteness, and I just cannot deal – no words!! We even get a “Red” to boot!! End of story!! Snap, speaking of judges, Nora, can you PLEASE call the Honorable Judge Babs Fitzwater, and ask her awesome self to come back to town? Pretty please. I am begging you. I will write a letter to her myself so that we could see her one more time before the show ends!!
Damn, Destiny, you could take Nat’s place on the LPD solving crimes! You are correct, Bo and Nora would not have just let C-Daddy’s ass go without a good reason! Wait til you hear what the reason is!
I hope Phyllis Rose paid David Vickers-Buchanan for using that “All Buchs, All the Time” phrase. Ya’ll remember when Vickers-Buchanan showed up at the manze in ’09 to film his reality show and said that they were going to get their own reality channel, “All Buchs, All the Time,” or am I the only loser who does? It is probably just me, and I am just fine with that!! Sidenote: Brian Frons could have just spun this off of OLTL if he wants reality television that badly. Great balls of fire! Let me stop there before my blood pressure gets out of control!! PS, Phyllis Rose, that is “baby daddy,” not “baby’s daddy.” Let’s get it straight, girlfriend!!
Well, I blinked and the two Marty and John scene was over! Now Nat and Chris are having some Hounds Beer! My mimosa is better than that, guys, no offense!
Des, let me give you an example of what a basket case is, sweetheart! Come to my house in January, 2012, and I will demonstrate. Matthew is not acting like a basket case. Anxious, yes! Basket case, no! Again, Des, apply for a job with the LPD cause you are one perceptive teenager!!!
YES – Nora is talking like a defense attorney again!!!! Holler for a dollar!!! And Dorian has still not arrived to interrupt their cuteness?!?! I am not complaining, but if Bo and Nora can get from Seattle to Llanview in two segments, surely Dorian can get to Bo and Nora’s crib in one. Is her mayoral motorcade comprised of horse and buggies rather than cars? Did one of the cars have a flat tire? Just asking. “How would we live with ourselves if we sent our son to prison?” Sweet Jesus, Nora is bordering on hysteria again, and I flove it for the sole reason that it is so true to her character, and it forces Bo to get in Bo mode with her!!!!
Again, I blinked and the John and Marty scene was over!! Yes, John, she is playing shrink, but she will soon lose her license for tampering with DNA results.
Duh, Nat! John is pushing your ass away because you effing lied to him. Uh oh, Phyllis Rose is talking about Christian. Sidenote: Where the hell did Christian get his degree? What sort of degree (bachelors, masters, doctorate, etc.) does he have? I can tell you, there is no way his ass has tenure at a university with less than a masters degree, at the very least! FACT!!!
Vimal = DNA Demon!! HAHAHA!! Christian does have nice arms, Phyllis!!
Thanks for the foreshadowing, Marty!!
Again, Nora is her hysterical self, and I flove it because Bo is her voice of reason!! Hello, “Imagine that Matthew is your client”! THANK YOU, Bo!!! Another defense attorney reference!! Good God, resign already Nora, and start your private defense practice up again. PLEEEEEEEAAAAASE!!!! Sidenote: Dorian STILL has not made it to their place yet. Lord, the Buchanan manze must be in BFE!!! Oh, hell, do we have to have a Ford boys reference? Sheesh, Bo! I cannot deal with their adorbs, true to character selves!! No words!! Nora to Bo: “Can you actually see turning in your own son?” Kill me now!! That day will be must see TV, people!!! Those three (Robert S. Woods, Hillary B. Smith, and Eddie Alderson) will rock that shit – FACT! Ah – and Dorian finally makes her cameo!! “Mayor Dorian Lord, here.” Yo, Dorian! You are married to David now; your name is now Mayor Dorian Lord Vickers-Buchanan! Get it straight!!
Uh, yea, Des, Matt knows who the killer is! Come on, send your resume to the LPD hiring department. You can use me as a reference!
Word – Rex and C-Daddy are back! Rex is still blaming C-Daddy for Shane’s state of mind! Snap, C-Daddy now blames Rex for Shane’s lack of self-esteem and offers to spend less than an hour with Shane to whip him into iron-man shape! Geez, C-Daddy, just let Mr. Black and Blue be his bodyguards, and no one will mess with him again. Sidenote: I am not trying to make light of the bullying situation, I assure you! Again, I am with Rex on this one.
Halftime: Bathroom Break!!
C-Daddy is genuinely concerned for Shane – I am still with Rex! And, yes, I do believe that people can change!!
Why the hell does Nat care if Christian drove Rama to see Vimal at Statesville?
I am still peeing on myself with this Rama and Nigel interaction! Duh, Rama, you hurt Vimal! You made his ass go to prison because of Aubs’ blackmail, and you lied to him and said you were preggers. Anyone else predicting a Christian-Rama hook-up so she gets preggers? This gal is!!!
Again, Nat, why so concerned for Christian when you like never see his ass – EVER!! Haha – Christian asks her if she is really giving him relationship advice!!!
Back to John and Marty – Yes, John will take Nat back once he finds out that that baby is his!
Yes, Des, Matt knows who the real murder is and so do Bo and Nora!! LOL!! Another qualification for Des to work for the LPD – she watches “Castle” every week!!! Nice shout out to an alum, OLTL!!!
And Dorian will now read Bo and Nora riot act!!! Aaaaand, I peed on myself when Dorian said “… fueled, in large part, by that biatch, Phyllis Rose”!!! I did, really!!! Hilar!! AND, now she has taken on a Texas twang to refer to the charges being dropped against C-Daddy!! I am hysterically laughing at this!!! Uh oh, Bo says that Dorian deserves to know why they dropped the charges against C-Daddy! Nora’s expression = “Bo, have you completely lost your natural damn mind?” I could seriously watch an entire episode of nothing but Hillary B. Smith’s facial expressions!! She is THAT good - FACT!!
Yea, John, starting to “get there” in terms of being friends with Marty again!! Wait til you find out that she is still dripping in crazy sauce!!
I am sure Christian appreciates you advice, Nat!! Thanks!! “E” for effort!!
Still loving these Rama and Nigel scenes!
Lord, Rex and Gigi need to learn to lock their door, too!! C-Daddy just busted the hell into that house to give Rex more pieces of his mind! The only people who seem to know how to lock their door are Bo and Nora at this point! Sidenote: Rex and Nora shop at the same store – I swear, Nora’s striped shirts look exactly like the one Rex has on! I never want to see Nora in one of those effing striped shirts ever again! Sheesh, show, just let Hillary B. Smith wear her own damn clothes! She wears far better looking clothes than the clothes that OLTL has been putting Nora in for the past year. Period! Anywho, buh-bye C-Daddy!!
Back to Bo and Nora’s crib! Love this interaction with three vets with tons of history on this show!! LOL at Nora’s line to Dorian, “Ok, Dorian, we talked about this. You can’t fire me. I’m an elected official.” Earth to Dorian, learn the law, girlfriend, you are the mayor!! District Attorneys are elected, not appointed!! Thanks!!! Great, Bo is going to see C-Daddy!! What? Rewind!! Did I just see a kiss? I must be hallucinating!! That was faboosh!! WHAT? Two kisses?!?! The world will end tomorrow, I am certain of this now!! Yes, Bo, please hurry back!!
Matthew, don’t tell Des, she has a big mouth. Ok, I take back my Destiny is better than Nat working for the LPD comment. No, Des, the killer is NOT Nora! … or is it?!?! Again, something remains fishy to me about this whole thing. Now, Phyllis Rose is saying she will reveal the real killer after the break – LOL, Des, welcome to the world of soap opera viewers!! The reveal is always “after the break,” or in today’s case, after the effing weekend break!! Aaaaand, Matthew is out of the Buenos Dias like his ass is on fire! He and John exchange looks – Lordy, now John is curious about his behavior! Heavens!!
Rex plays C-Daddy’s words back in his head! Wonder where this is leading! If you have seen the promo for the week, you already know!!
LOL – C-Daddy walks in on Nigel and Rama watching “Access Llanview”!!! Hialr!! Nigel will now have to clean up all of that damn popcorn Rama just spilled all over the floor. C-Daddy is now grabbing his chest! Anyone who has read the spoilers for next week knows where this shit it going!
Thank you Cristian!! Rama is not really preggers! Hopefully you heed Nat’s warning to stay away from her! And, btw, Christian, you are not hired by the LPD. Marty has cleaned out her purse, and those DNA results will say that John is Liam’s father, mark my word!! Stick to art, mijo!! Adios!! See you for the finale in January!
Aaww, crazy Marty!! Still scheming!! I will be sad to see her go before the finale, but I flove her craziness!!
Snap, C-Daddy is back – who is he talking to on the phone? Mr. Black and Blue? Or, does he also have the principal of LHS on speed dial, as he does the dean of LU? Aaaand, Bo is here!! YES!!! Cannot wait for their next confrontation on Monday!! Jerry ver Dorn and Robert S. Woods are stellar in their scenes together!! Sidenote: Why the eff is C-Daddy’s tie ALWAYS crooked? Paging wardrobe! I am not joking, people! Notice this! It is always crooked!! I guess since Nora left him, he has no one to see that his ties are straight?! Rene’ is too engrossed in redoing the back yard of the manse or in her attic gin rummy game with Addie to help a brother out, I guess, and Nigel is too engrossed in Access Llanview. Goodness – good help is hard to find these days!! Ha!
Ok, I spoke way too soon on Bo and Nora locking their door. Matthew just came running through there like a bat out of hell, to borrow a phrase from the waitress at the Buenos Dias PS, Did Matthew leave without paying? Like he needs any more offenses to add to his wrap-sheet. On second thought, Bo and Nora probably just have a charge account there anyway. Lord have mercy, Nora! You are a woman home alone, in an apartment complex. Lock the damn door! And, apparently, the Bo Buchanan family got a new television (or a new remote) since we last saw it on New Year’s Eve because that remote is completely different than the last one we saw at their place!! Am I the only loser that notices these things?
UGH – Phyllis Rose is seriously going to be the way everyone in Llanview finds out about Matthew?! Well, Destiny, looks like we are waiting way longer than a commercial break now!! Sidenote: I flove Nora’s glasses!! She looks so official perusing over those files wearing them!! Damn, Eddie Alderson is taller than Hillary B. Smith now!! Wow – he really is all grown up!! How bittersweet!!
Previews for Monday look faboosh!! Get ready everyone because Nikki Smith is about to make a final cameo before OLTL rides off into the sunset! This bitch is pumped up!!!
Well, that is all for this episode, everyone!! I am sure by now you are more than ready for ME to return from the beach on Sunday (or Monday)!! I hope I did not bore you to death and that there are not too many typos! I tried so hard not to be too long-winded!! It is easier said than done!! Regardless, I have enjoyed giving you my thoughts on OLTL in general and on Friday’s show, and I hope you have enjoyed reading them!!
Until next time, have a great weekend, my fellow bloggers!
Mary Heather (“MH,” or just “Heather”)