Saturday, April 9, 2011

Dear Nikki Smith, Please Burn Down "Serenity Springs." xx, ME

Nikki Smith: "Mary-Ella, I ASSURE you I am the woman for the job. I won't disappoint you. I never do."

Good Morning and Happy Saturday to all you lovely people! I TRIED desperately to sleep such luck. I was up with the chickens AND we went out and had drinks last night...what's the deal? Anyway, I thought I'd go on and post this morning because I have lots of stuff to do on the computer this morning AND then it is off to conquer Michigan Avenue for some shopping! Also...I need to hurry up and watch/post because Ross will not shut up about watching "The Masters" today (on the big tv with the DVR...ugh). Talk about the most exciting television of the year! All of this "Masters" talk has turned into how he has now officially made up his mind to take up golf this summer. Good thing because his tennis game is SHIT! Sweet hope there! That is the one negative with us: no competitive matches. WOOF! Ok...enough of my mess...

UGH....the MyFace graphing paper background. Eff that. Yes!!!!!! Did someone snatch Langston?! Hopefully they are putting her on a jet to Cali...

Oh cute! I like Kelly's dress! Wait...her hair color is different! Snap. YESSSSS! Marty is NOT tardy for the party today...she is on early!

I they REALLY have to show Brody shirtless? REALLY?! Again, I need the Buchs to have a better nursery set up. Unacceptable. Anyway, he does look cute with the baby.

Noooooooo!!!!!!!! OMG!!! F*@k me. I'm about to throw myself out of my apartment window. REALLY?! The Serenity Springs gym?! Dammit! I hate this place! PUH-LEEZE let Nikki Smith burn down this hellhole AND the Minuteman Motel when she returns for a hot minute...begging. You just KNOW that poor Luna Moody is rolling over in her grave about what they have done to this place. Jesus! She and Max worked so hard to make it great and now shirtless goons are running a muck. Ugh. This post just became negative...woof.

Hey Joey...spring break for pre-k? Oh...hey Rama, too. Sup? I've come to the conclusion that none of these clowns work out at SS. They just stand around and discuss ALOUD all of their secrets. Productivity at its finest.

Did I mention recently that I FLOVE the "The Sun's" headlines...flove them. Ugh...I hate this damn steam room, too.

Ford: "I'm gaining muscle mass." Lord have mercy...

Well, hell. There goes my hope Langston got snatched. On a positive note....HEY THERE, DORIAN! Missed you! She and David will deliver, I'm sure. Snap! Dorian is looking FABU!!!!

OMG...that bejeweled hoodie that Tess has on looks trashy as hell. Remove it. Ugh. Whoa! Are they going to make-out?

How is Aubrey not DYING from a heat stroke with all those clothes on in the steam room?! Please no STD passing sex today...please God.

Natalie looks so pretty in that lavender.

Joey was going to spin class?!?! SPIN CLASS!? I just don't see how he could comfortably sit on that bike and get his ass kicked for 40 minutes. This is shit.

Ah! I DO see a Natalie/Brody spark.

Again, Dorian looks GORG! That shirt Lang is wearing is a black cloud. Actually, it looks like she has two big-ass spider webs on her shirt. "Vicker Man: The David Vickers Buchanan Story." LOL. This will be over the top and doubt.

I hate to say this, but I liked Kelly's hair better blonde. She is still beautiful, though. Snap! Marty Marty Marty!

Pa and Step-Nora...flove it. Strangely enough, Langston is the only one making sense in this Clint Buchanan is cleared of charges convo. Word, yo.

Kelly: "I didn't realize you were.." Marty: "Sane?" LOL!

Put your shirt on Brody! I mean...he is an attractive man, but I don't think this is the time or place to be shirtless. I'm sure this was done to just add sexual tension and awkwardness between these two. This plus the breast feeding thing...lord.

Aubrey has to be DYING!!! I mean...I'm dying in those things with just a towel. How is she physically handling this?! This is beyond me.

WHAT?! Christian Vega? I don't care if they are gonna have Rama take an interest in him or not: It's clear the writers don't know what to effing do with him. He is lost as a character. Game Over. Ugh...Joey, just go to spinning class. NOOOOOOOO!!!!!! They just made a KK reference! Yikes! Thank God, he said they aren't an item. I'd effing pass out if he said yes. Woof. Snap...I think maybe the reason I have been restless sleeping is because I'm still having nightmares about KK's acting debut. Those scenes mindf*@ked me, I swear! This is the movie "Inception" I'm sure of it! A mention of

I'm annoyed by the steam room.

Lord today...Tess and Ford?! This could have been hot but then Ford said "I saved the worst for last." Oh.Hell.No. People get punched for saying shit like that.

My God that painting above the mantle is heinous! hahahahahaha!!!! Clint's character will have erectile dysfunction! Flove it! Wait...what are all the weird looks for with the movie? Are they gonna do it or not? WTF.

I looked down and back up and the Tess/Ford thing was over.

hahaha!!!! These Brody/Natalie scenes are hilarious. "Oh, I guess they [boobs] have a mind of their own sometime!" ha! I believe that is doubt!

WHAT?! Tess just bit Ford?! This is crazy! What is this "Basic Instinct?" All this violent lust...

I really kinda love the Brody/Natalie scenes! OMG!!!! She just flashed him! Love it! Oh no...Brody said he was going to the gym. F*@k...stay away from there!!!! Nikki will burn it down!

Weird/Random sidenote: Ross is playing on his iPhone as I type/watch and he just said: "I got on Facebook and 'checked in' at the Playboy headquarters (it's down the street) and tagged you and said we were at your photo shoot." PERFECT! Just perf. Ah!

Eh...I am not lovin' the Aubs/Cutter scenes.

haha!!!! Marty is quite the joker! Marty: "Whoa have to assume that Natalie is in the dark about you two seeing each other...afterall, Kelly is still standing." They teach improv classes at St. Anne's huh? Poor Kelly...she ALWAYS has to leave immediately. Someone always busts them up. Woof.

Ugh...Joey is being such a douche of epic proportions today.

Whoa...I missed the Brody/Christian scene.

I love a good Natalie/Marty scene. I prefer these two alone though. They are so much more intense! Wow...Marty's comment about Liam/Natalie/Brody was about a 10 shades of awkward.

Again...I missed the Brody/Christian scene. WTF...

NOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Now both Ford and Tess are going to the gym!!! Why am I being punished?! I am a good girl...about 50% of the time. No one deserves this one, I tell you! NO ONE!!!

Wow..."Access Llanview" mentions out the ass today. LOL...David was fired from his own movie? Langston is kinda funny today. Oh Lang will be the writer? Hmmm. I think it's a good idea. This is much more believable for her to be the writer for these two instead of some Steven Spielberg movie. Good move. I cannot help but laugh when Vickers says Step Nora.

Tess: "Jessica's out to lunch, but I will give her the message." LOL. OMG...these people just lollygag at this gym!!! NOW...Kelly shows up dressed to the nines! This is so damn absurd...ABSURD! Aaaaand Kelly just said "Or does Bo and Nora have another suspect." Good Lord!!!! Grammar is POWER! Ugh! Bo and Nora are two separate people...the verb should be "do." F*@king shoot me!

Marty is so fabulous. Actually, Susan Haskell is just THAT fabulous, really. Marty has never been my favorite, but SH is so FABU that I just love watching her. ESPECIALLY after she has been marinating in St. Anne's secret sauce. The craziness is soaking in it!

Rama and Christian will hook-up. Hopefully, the writers will do something productive with Christian's character.

Snap...Marty's crazy ass is plotting. She has crazy eyes...oh.hell.yes.

Awe...the sonogram pic.

Joey just admit you still like Kelly. Woof. Snap, now I think I like Kelly's hair this color. I can't decide!

Tess...stay away he has STDs!!! You already have hepatitis...beware.

They are making this Lang exit better than I thought. I suspected she would just get an offer, but at least this is believable. Dorian wants Langston to be happy and this is a way to get her away from Ford and be creative. Sweet...the director will be Marko.

Eh...this episode was not that great. I'm not upset because all the other episodes this week were effing PHENOM!!!

Well...ooookay. I'm off to return some messages/emails then to shop in this gloomy ass weather. Where is the sun?! I'll try and reply to previous comments later...must run.



  1. I don't see Natalie developing any feelings for Brody beyond gratitude for his help with Liam and the continued friendship they've always had. But I can definitely see Brody developing an unnatural attachment to Nat and Liam - the guy's already lost 2 other similar situations. SH can do so much w/ only a few seconds onscreen and smallest turn of a smile paired with crazy eyes. Damn. And Kelly still seems out of place everywhere she shows up. I can't help but wonder if GT doesn't look at her scripts and go, "Wait - I am WHERE today doing WHAT?" She needs to put down roots in a story and stay for a while.

  2. I think I learn more about grammar and proper pronunciation in your blog then any other form of education that I have received! Its crazy! lol
    I like Natalie and Brody, and I really, really, really wish she would flash would make my day...
    Damn Marty is crazy! I never liked her and I still don't.
    Rama is ridiculously beautiful, but she is a total douche, you are still married honey!
    They totally did end on kind of a low note after this blockbuster week...

  3. OLTL is ridiculous in their "Men without shirts" segments--It's so obvious what they are trying to do and it really doesn't work. Bo and Clint are a 1000 percent sexier in clothes over Ford, Brody and Cutter without--STOP TAKING YOUR SHIRT OFF BOYS!! and Ford in his bike shorts or a towel--blech!!

    The Cutter and Aubs story just isn't cutting it-and I like the actors. I would have made aubrey the daughter of Alex and Carlo, and Cutter the joe character and fashioned a totally different story. Sorry but NO Buch should like Kelly--she slept with Kevin when married to Joe and Duke when married to Kevin and DUKE DIED!! and she is a BAD mother--but actually all the Cramer women are LOL Dorian hasn't raised one of hers, and neither did her sisters--now Kelly and Starr are following suit--hahahaha (and Blair you ARE to blame for Jack!)

    yikes a I am negative today :)

  4. I am with you, burn Serenity Springs and the minute man, I'd be thrilled if I never either set again! Nasty words come out my mouth every time I see the gym. At least I never have to worry about see my Bo and Nora there! We know their stance on exercise!

    Friday was kind of disappointment after the week this show had. Really didn't get into any or the stories. Ford and Tess just grossed me out. And what? Natalie couldn't tell her breast were hanging out? I've got a pair like hers, and trust me, I know when they are not in their normal place. She just wanted to show them off to Brody.
    But, I am feeling the Brody/Nat thing too.

  5. loved Michael Easton as the vampire on Port Charles but his schtick doesn't work for me on OLTL with natalie---please pair Brody and Nat I just don't see the connection with john--she becomes his zombie

  6. @Anonymous You may be right with Natalie and Brody (since I haven't read spoilers with them), but I still feel some spark between them. I personally want something to hapen between them. Also, ditto...SH is just freakin' awesome. Beyond superb with everything. Kelly...I actually like her with John. However, I still think her return has been botched overall...for sure!

    @YoSammity I am so damn glad you are taking something away from this blog! I feel I just fill people's minds with nonsense and bullshit! I'm pretty sure I would have been okay with Natalie flashing me, even. Also, yes Marty is crazy but the more she marinates in the psycho sauce the more I love her. Rama is totally GORG. Agreed, total douche department at the moment. Poor Vimal, OMG. Show def ended on a low note but the other 4 days were beyond stellar!!

    @rac So, as I was typing this I got an email that you did a second response...responding to both right now. OMG...I'm with ya sista!!! Bo/ on a stick. Love them 1,000 times more than those shirtless Fords and all of the others. AH!!!! I was DYING for Aubs to be Alex's daughter. Gosh, the daughter of Alex and Carlo. Fab story. Like you, I like the actors...not the characters. Kelly is the shittiest mother of all time (Starr is second!). She doesn't even talk about Zane. Don't get me started about that Duke mess. I did love her with Kevin. God, I FLOVE DG as Kevin. I have such a crush on him. I, too, want a Nat and Brody pairing. I didn't watch PC, and I don't watch GH or AMC. From what I heard, that vampire mess was ridic. However, Ross and I love to listen to John McBain talk. hehe.

    @mojomiller bring the gasoline and I'll bring the matches! Can we PLEASE get rid of both shitholes!?!? LOL...Bo and Nora were sore for days after exercising one time. Thank God they know to stay away! Ditto...Friday was a total disappointment compared to the other days. Ford and Tess...I am still disturbed she bit him. Oh, Natty totally knew her boobs were there for the taking. As if. And, yes! I am totally feeling a Brody/Natalie thing. Brody and Jessica were rather boring...