Thursday, April 21, 2011

If Marty is Still Around to Throw a Memorial Day Cookout, I'd Love to Attend

Marty: "So John, you can come to the Memorial Day cookout that Hannah O'Connor and I are hosting? The marinade is great, and I will be roasting Kelly Cramer. De-lish."

Hello! Hello! Hello! It's almost bunny time! I am so thankful I get off work at 3 tomorrow, because I am dragging all kinds of ass! Oh, and also...I had ZERO comments from my last post. Not that I'm upset, but I sure hope I didn't offend anyone! Was the post that terrible? It was decent, I thought? Hmmm. Anyway, I'll leave it alone. Now if people don't comment for a week then maybe there are problems...just a tad. ;)

F*@k me. NuJack is in the FIRST scene. I hate today already. "You know it's April vacation?" You mean spring break, dipshit? Who says "April vacation?"

Lord have mercy. Here is the terrible doctor from the ER. I'm praying she is better in the office. Fingers crossed. OMG...this whole thing is kinda awkward.

I just can't handle NuJack. I want to give him an open wound and just pour the salt in it. YES!!! I know that is uber bitch of me. I don't care. fake "Toad" in the bed. Lord today. LOL...Tomas with a syringe. This show is all about syringes, I swear.

Ooooh YES!!! John McBain--all dark clothing, whispering, being cool...check. Yay! Aaaaand he and Kelly! YAY!!! They are being normal and cute. Let's hope it stays that way. Oh, I'm sorry...there is some St. Anne's marinade that just dripped on you, John. Lookout! Marty is on the scene! Boom. Unleash crazytown please.

Wow...Brody is beyond adorable with the baby and all the gear. The three of them look cute. Natalie's boobs look FABU, p.s. I need a pair like that! careful! She will attack! Don't let those cute golden ringlets fool you into thinking Madame Marty is demure and cute...just no.

OMG that baby is edible!!!! Those cheeks!!! Good God!

Be.Still.My.Heart. Thank you God! Bo Buchanan...welcome. I'm so happy to see you. I needed this. Wait...may I just say that it is egregious and absurd that there has been no follow-up with Matthew saying he was ready to confess. I'm assuming that Matt and Nora are just hanging out at home watching Kathie Lee and Hoda. Obviously...

F*@kkkkkkkk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nathaniel Q. Salinger (Quincy?). God Bless. It's almost Easter weekend for crying out loud. Of course, this bastard has to hop into my life before the bunny. OF COURSE. Woof Woof. where is that syringe? Sidenote: Tomas is quite tan.

OMG...all they are talking about is that damn Euro they found at the scene! For the love of muff! Can we PUH-LEEZE get off of the Euro business. The only reason it's absurd is because everyone's like "My God, don't you know there are a shit-ton of people with Euros in Llanview." Comical. Awe...Bo's shirt is cute. YESSSSSSS!!!!! Bo just said "Thomas." I flove him.

Ah! The syringe is by Nate's foot. Tomas you just can't win. just grates on my nerves that NuJack has an attitude with Blair. AHHHHH!!!! I just want to scream when I see children roll their eyes, act rudely, and flat out disrespect their parents. Damn. Blair doesn't deserve this. Granted, her choices in men have been piss-poor at best but still...

Let the child speak to the doctor alone Balsom-Morasco's. It is just more awkward if y'all are in there. How cute!!! I'm sorry. I like Natty and Brody more by the day, and I know it probably won't go anywhere.

Kelly darling, listen: Barefoot Contessa NEVER fails me, so she won't fail you. John will love it. I swear by the woman. She is like my best (imaginary) friend. Go get her latest one...fabu. xx, ME SNAP!!!! Marty's marinating all over town!!! AHHH!!!! Shallow note: lovely necklace, Kelly. I have one VERY similar. Anyway...LOL. John's only with you to hurt Natalie. Love it! Marty is STIRRING THE DAMN POT!!!!

I blinked and missed the Brody/Natalie scene.

Blair, I just want to take the time to thank you for getting out of that shiteous vest. I'll give you one of my Cadbury eggs. Like you'd eat it, but still. It's the thought that counts. Wow...Clint's men are going after NuJack...oh.hells.yes.

Gigi...let the boy talk to the doctor alone. F*@k. Listen to Rex!!! I will say...Rex is quite doting and understanding when he wants to be. I love a sweet guy/man.


This whole CIA thing is weird. I honestly don't have the first effing clue about who Tomas really is...seriously. I haven't read spoilers on this so I am just as in the dark as you are. Hmmm I wonder if Bo makes strong coffee like I do? Also, who are Bo's contacts at the agency?

Blair...he needed that. I'm sorry. I'm sure I'll catch hell for that, but I can't stand this kid. WOOF!

I must say that I TOTALLY see where Shane is coming from. He is probably like "I almost killed myself so my parents want to help and fix it and get married. They don't have to do that. Plus, I'm still a loser." This doctor does not make me feel comfortable...

Wait...why doesn't Tomas want Blair to call the police?? Hmmm.

I am thankful that Nate hasn't been on too much this episode. Ok, y'all fake "Toad" is so much bigger than regular "Toad." His tummy!!! Well, Tomas just caught another break...

I love Natalie's necklace, too. Awe...a little Brody/Natty hug. WOW! I can't believe they are giving Rex and Natalie a scene together! I feel like it's been ages!

Wow...not only is Marty acting crazy, but now she is acting crazy ABOUT John, too. Like obsessive, crazy, stalker girlfriend crazy. Wait...can I just say that I FLOVE these Kelly/Marty scenes! I mean...I really do.

WAIT...I have to say this. So, we DVR at our house and all but sometimes I'll watch the bumpers. OMG, when the Blair one is on Ross and I kinda sing in that high pitched voice like Blair does. We are such douches. Obviously, Blair sounds, not so much.

OMG I FLOVE these Kelly/Marty scenes.

Awe, Bo I feel like I have hardly seen you today...whannn! Of course, Bo remains selfless as ever and asks John how he is doing. Le sigh.

Marty (in crazy, assertive voice): "You will not win. I will not allow it." Sweet Lord! I can't even elaborate or say sassy things because they are THAT good! Ok, so Kelly genuinely looked scared. You should be girlfriend. OMG...Ross is totally insulted that "The Sun" has a handrawn (which he finds mindboggling and stupid) chart of the Euro against the dollar.

That's right, Bo. You know your guilt will overcome you and you'll go visit. Sidenote: he is STILL bronzed and glowing! Flove.

Ugh...the Rex/Natty scenes are too short! They are never together and now they are and NOTHING. So damn quick!

Gigi don't be stupid. I hate stupidity: mine or anyone else's. You know she can't repeat what Shane says. Hush. Game over.

You know Blair, I'm sure NuJack got beat up for wearing that t-shirt he has on. It's hideous. Is it just me or is Tomas totally CONSPICUOUS!? I mean, he tries to be cool, calm, and collected...and inconspicuous. However, he screams "I'm a suspect!" Woof.

NQS is using his brain. Good for him. I still don't like him. At all. Sean has hardly talked!!! WTF is up with that? Give him some lines.

Lord...Bo feels guilty. Yes, he won't go to the hospital now...but there is guilt.

I EFFING BLINKED and missed the Rex/Natty scene! WOOF! I understand Natalie's point, but I understand Rex's more. I understand why he doesn't want to see him. That's all I got.

Thank God, Gigi is acting normal again. I liked the doctor with Gigi. Hmmm. I dunno what's going on.

Jack!!!! Do NOT yell and say "What?! Why not?" to your mother like that. You.Need.Your.Ass.Beaten. I must say that Blair was slightly dense with leaving NuJack alone...dumb.

Kelly: "Marty just showed up at my office, and it was weird to say the least." LOL. Staking her claim. I FLOVE territorial, stalker Marty. Hmmm....Kelly will figure this out, maybe. John will have a lot going on.

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!! "Yes something's wrong!" I cannot tell you how much I am enjoying cray cray sauce Marty. I want this bitch to wreck havoc!!! (selfish note: Not on Bo and Nora because they have enough going on. Ok, thanks) This bitch is a ticking time bomb!!! Tick tock...

LOL..."just when I thought my day couldn't get any weirder." Kelly and Marty have made the show today. WTF? Is there something in that envelope having to deal with the REAL TODD? Hmmm.

I am so tired of Tomas being suspicious...hurry this up dammit. We only have until January.

Where are these kids' parents?!?!?! Good God! Shane is terrified and NuJack is in much too good condition.

Bo is in deep thought...lord have mercy.

Awe...John seeing Natty and the bay-bay. That kinda tugged at my heart.

Wow...what a bombshell. Natalie had whose baby?! John's you say?! NOOOOOO!!!! It can't be! The show has not led us to believe that for a minute. I KNOW for a fact that piece of paper Marty has been throwing around has been a recipe for baby back ribs. You mean to tell me it was Natalie's paternity test results. Well...I'm just shocked.

Marty and Kelly made the show today. Plus, I adored seeing Bo even though he hardly said a damn thing.

Hope tomorrow is a GOOD FRIDAY! Get it? ;)

Oh, love you all! See you tomorrow or Saturday. Probably tomorrow.



  1. I'm on the other side, having officially lived in LLanview. I happen to know where the rainbow's gonna end (sort of). That said, here are some spoilers: Please DON'T READ ANY FURTHER IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS.

    Marcie and Michael return. Todd isn't really Todd, it has to do with government brainwashing, whatever, they can explain it so that Roger makes his return (that SO much suck for Trevor). Yeah, and is Tomas, really Tomas? Yeah, no. Remember, Todd's real name is Thomas.

    Cristian gets a HUGE story now that he's about to accidentally knock up Rama, inadvertently helping her prove to Vimal she's delicate. Yeah, that'll last 5 minutes. look for dna, troubles and the truth to all come out.

    How will Cole deal with the loss of his mother? Sad way to write off one of the best actresses on television. Crazy wasn't enough, death is. On the emotional side, look for her real life hubby to take here "home" as Patrick Thornhart. Humanitarian reasons let Cole out of Prison, and some weird connection gets Lyndsay out too. Can't wait.

    Gabrielle and Al make a return, even if it is as ghosts or flashbacks. So do the Woleks, Bo's real life wife, and Cord, Tina, Max and Cain Rogan. Seriously.

    Look for flashbacks of Eterna, 1888, 1968 time travel, Argentina.

    Nigel becomes a millionaire.

    In the final episode, Vicky reminisces with an album and Blair sings the original theme. I should tell you it jumps many years into the future. Hope is an adult, yeah, HOPE is the reason.

    I've got more, but I'm leaving it at that. For now. lol

  2. I can't take the goodbye ending stuff yet, it's TOO HARD.

    AS for NuJack, anyone notice his CHEEK had a slice in it???? Scar, anyone?

  3. I was kinda bored yesterday. I kept having to remind myself to enjoy every second of this show cause there aren't many left. Then I got all depressed.

  4. Eh, past couple of days. Thursday's epi there was something off about it, but I don't know what, I just felt like it was disjointed.
    Not mention, why in the world did they name Matthew as the killer, then only have his story on once a week? Shouldn't this be front and center? Oh, wait I guess Deanna trying to tell James why they broke up is much more drama.

  5. Is that Richmond stuff true or a joke??hmmm because I loved Cain Rogan and Tina!

    Anyway does anyone buy that Nate would be the one to find syringe and connect it to Tomas--really because I didn't think he was smart enough, and why did John assume Tomas was an international criminal--I'm thinking international SPY!!
    Love nutty Marty

    Have a great weekend all!

  6. Lemme try and quickly do this from work, darlings...

    @Richmond Chandler OMG...I think I just peed myself and now must go change! Where did you come up with all that?! I love it! Maybe you should write for the show. Can't wait for more! I cringed at the 1968 time travel reference...ah!!!! hahahaha HOPE is the reason!!!! Flove it!

    @Kim I'm trying not to think too much about it and just enjoy the show. I got so upset when GL was canceled that I didn't enjoy it at all. However, I KNOW I'll get weepy around the holidays. :( Praying it can be saved. NuJack needs more than a damn scar. I want to beat him.

    @Katie I was totally bored. Again, I only enjoyed the Marty/Kelly and Marty/doctor scenes. Plus, I just enjoyed seeing Bo. I haven't been really entertained since Monday. I'm totally depressed about the show, but I am trying to not think about it. If I do, then I wouldn't be able to post anything decent. :(

    @mojomiller good observation with it being "off." Again, I only liked the Kelly/Marty scenes and I will watch Bo just stare at a wall. Like you saw, I mentioned that it's egregious that B/N/M haven't been on. I agree, Deanna disclosing the truth about why she and James REALLY broke up is the sole reason I'm watching the show...duh. It's riveting really...woof

    @rac hahaha! I think it's a joke? Yes? God, I FLOVE Tina. I wonder if she could leave B&B to make a cameo...sigh. Ugh...I just want Nate to stick himself with the syringe and fall out. He sucks ass so badly. haha...John McBain is just THAT good and all knowing. ;) That's why he assumed he was a criminal. Nutty Marty made the show yesterday. Flove her crazy sauce! You have a great Easter weekend, too!

  7. Kelly/Marty has NOTHING on Natalie/Marty. Oh Kelly, you are SO far out of your league! Marty is gonna wipe the floor with you. And really, where was she going to "cook" anything for John in his tiny dingy hotel room?

    I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say DEANNA is involved in the Eddie Ford murder. They've got to save Matthew from jail time so I am thinking there are some other factors that will come to light. I'd love it if Nate had a fling w/ her behind James' back and then the brother killed each other in a duel (and it all played out in only one day of story so we'd be rid of them fast), but I don't think I'll get that lucky....

  8. The "denim on denim" comment from the previous post offended me so much, that I had to wait a couple days to recover...I think I pull it off quite well...Ha ha...

    Omg I was so happy that Jack was getting roughed up, even though I wished it would last a lot longer than it did. Finally somebody somewhat moderately knocks some sense into him.

    And I'm not quite as astute as you so I did not notice any of this crazy sauce that Marty has been marinating in, but it was in full effect on this episode! So funny!

  9. @Anonymous You're right. The Marty/Natalie feud is better, but I did love Kelly and Marty going at it. Rarely see them together. Maybe she was going to cook at her nice house? I bet John's apt. is nasty, no doubt. I bet Deanna had something to do with the Eddie murder, too. I think next Tuesday we see scenes with them? I know Eddie flashbacks are next week and Deanna has something to do with it. Nice scenario about the Ford brothers...we can wish, right???

    @YoSammity OH NO!!! I hope this doesn't ruin our lovely little friendship on here. I'm sure the denim on denim looks fabu on doubt. The NuJack rough up was too brief. I needed that kid to get his ass beaten!!! hehe...the sauce is just DRIPPING from Marty! Love it. Hope you can forgive my denim comment during Easter. xx

  10. So how about the possibility that Eddie came on to Deanna. She has his baby, not James' as some are wondering. Then she has a motive to kill him. Could we be that lucky?

    And ME, I would "watch Bo just stare at a wall" as well. The man just does it for me.

  11. or how about deanna had Ford's baby and those are the DNA tests that got mixed up with Jessica's because Vimal was so verklempt he had no idea what he was doing. (would Ford be so gung ho to raise a baby that is trustfund less??)

  12. Hey Mija...Chandler knows his shit !!!!! I'll be astonished if any of that dosn't take place.....Crazy Shoes are now Crazy Waiders...This isn't gonna end well with her...Clint needs to wake the frack up and straighten this all out !! Miss you and hope nothings wrong...probs just busy..Luuuurrrrrvvvveeee You ! Krisi