Nora: "Oh no, Bo! You mean we have to be in ANOTHER episode with all teens? This is so unfair! Next time they want to put us in another teen episode I'll promise to make up an unbeatable excuse. We'll be 'sittin' shiva' but not really... ;) "
Oooookay. So I am quickly sitting down to blog before we go out for the evening...too gorgeous out. Have to drink, be merry and appreciate this weather! So...as I said earlier, Wednesday and Thursday's episodes were just oozing in shit. Y'all know that. I could go off on the teen scene for days upon days, but I decided I'm not gonna do that. In my opinion, these episodes weren't even worthy of blog posts. I dunno...maybe y'all liked these episodes, but I was just not into either of them. So, I'm going to take the advice of my constitutional law professor. When preparing for our big exam at the end of the semester he would always tell us to think of our answer like a woman's skirt: long enough to cover the subject, but short enough to keep it interesting. Well, I'm gonna do JUST that. I'm literally just going to spout off random, terse observations about the show. That's it. Then, I'm gonna pray Friday's episode is fabu (I think Vicki and Dorian are on so please...), so I can do a full post again and things get back to normal. I mean...blogging about this show during the summer is effing difficult. I cannot lie. Ok lemme get this started...
Wednesday, July 13th--Bo and Nora's Desperate Plea to Be Saved From This Episode
1. I refuse to discuss Starr and James. They have so many effing in depth discussions and I just hate them at this point. Also, Dorian's pool is lame as shit.
2 Rick: "So who is ready to make a porn?" Lemme tell ya...this girl right here! ME!!!!!!! Seriously, I would do Nathaniel Q. Salinger EVERY WAY IMAGINABLE if the show would get rid of the effing teen scene and get back on track. I would do it...seriously. No one can say I'm not a team player. Word.
3. Oh you're nauseated Mes? You bitch. I'm sick as shit, too, and it is all because of YOU! So thanks a lot. UGH! I have to say that the evil thoughts I have about Mes are not suitable for this blog. I've never felt such hatred for a character.
4. The ONE good thing about this episode: Bo and Nora. They were adorable, and I really liked Nora's outfit. I'm so thankful she has consecutively worn new and fabu clothing...thank you, Jesus! Oh, and when Bo told Nora he was with her...now, forever...be still my heart. He is so fabulous. Nora you don't know what to do with your time? Why don't y'all just have sex?
5. Todd and Tea's bed looks UBER comfy! I mean...I just want to crawl in the bed. They can argue about God knows what and I'd just sleep.
6. Dayt-en's cardigan has tomatoes all over it. Hideous. If I could throw tomatoes at my screen this episode, I would. Or, I want to shove a shit-ton of tomatoes down NQS' throat and have him choke...a bit too violent? Yes. But, I thought it so oh well.
7. I think Vivian is a very, very pretty woman. She should be shown more after Mes is killed off...since I'm gonna will that to happen somehow. Seriously, I will make sure Mes meets her demise. I know I'll want to kill Mes Monday cause, unfortunately, she and Nora have scenes together...alone. I will go postal I'm sure.
8. *Sigh* I don't want to discuss the Ford/Jess shit. I'll say that Jess still sucks rhino balls as a character and now the writers are STILL trying to brainwash us to think that Ford didn't rape Jess. He can now love her because he loved Tess. She has the same hair! The same voice! He just has to have her...otherwise he is heartbroken! Oh no! UGH!!!!! Somebody just effing slit my wrist with the broken glass from the Todd/Vickster picture frame. Dammit to hell!
9. I mean...this mango gum nonsense is absurd. And, when Nora told Bo he didn't chew gum I was like....WTF? He has it in his mouth like every episode. LOL.
10. I was so riveted by the Tomas/Baz conversation about effing music!!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME!?
This episode was disgusting. I hate that B/N had to be apart of this foolishness, but I'm thankful they kept me from losing it. On now to Thursday...
Thursday, July 14th--Mija's About to Lose Her Shit!!!!
1. Sam is by far the coolest character on this episode. I hear ya Sam...you're missing your birthday party and your miffed. I'm miffed this show is beating the shit out of me this summer. Life's tough. Another thing: Sam is most def the BEST DRESSED character this episode! Those shoes!
2. I love the "soap pads" label in the Buenos Dias kitchen.
3. Ross' comment about Baz was "that' a f*@kin' dumbass shirt." I can't argue with that statement...
4. I'm praying Rick is not a porn director but really a serial killer and has been sent to Llanview for the sole purpose of murdering half the teens.
5. I love Tea's powder blue robe. She looks presh.
6. In case y'all forgot, Blair's a terrible mother and makes bad decisions in life thanks to her out of control sex drive.
7. Blair and John McBain have the same hair...
8. Ross loves RICK and frankly...I do too this episode. Jesus H. Christ this episode is atrosh.
9. John McBain was UBER ADORBS with little Sam! I'm sorry...he was. I mean...Sam was like his little buddy. I lurve it!
10. That's it. I can't do this anymore. I just sent an email to the ABC studios to see if I could set up a time and place to eff NQS so I can save us all from this shit we are being subjected to day after day. I'm doing this for you, people!!!!
Than you, Jesus! We are going out to have fun! Again, Friday's episode will be better and I will be able to do a full blog. I feel it!
Love you, mean it!!!