Thursday, July 21, 2011

All Hail Head Bitch in Charge, Victoria. Oh, and Afterwards There Will Be a Dart Party in McBain's Office. Hounds and Jim Daniels Provided.

McBain: "So you mean to tell me that you and Vicki were playing darts and Natalie walked in and then you asked her to join you in play? She said yes? Unbelievable. I had planned to use my dart board as a lure to get Natty back. You ruined that. Now I must kill you."

Top o' the mornin' to ya! Okie dokie so I'm trying to catch up here. Work, wedding, heatwave, etc. have been keeping me busy. Sooo....I'm about to do a drive-by of Tuesday. *GASP* Yes, the show was EXCELLENT on Tuesday. Don't worry...I'll try and hit the high points. Then, I'm doing a full post of Wednesday's show so I'll be all caught up. Hopefully I won't disappoint y'all too much.

Tuesday, July 19th--Vicki's The Head Bitch In Charge Of This Episode...Even If The Two Todds Speak To Each Other For The First Time! Vicki Rules.

High Points
Good God! ALL HAIL Queen Victoria! I LURVE her when she is totally the head bitch in charge. Just when she can't get any cooler, she slaps Vickers. I mean...this bitch can't get any cooler. She is Queen of Llanview for a reason, and she rules soap operas. Game over. Oh, and Vicki looks uber out of place at the LPD...FYI.

As if the Vicki goodness wasn't enough, we get Echo and Dorian. Kim Zimmer is fabulous and so entertaining. Oh, and Robin Strasser can entertain me thoroughly...even with tape over her mouth! These two are golden. Echo drunk is hilar. Times...did Eddie Ford teach her how to tie someone up? Felt like it was deja vu. And, how is Dorian breathing!?!? DAYUM. Bonus: Little Sam was indeed a superhero. Lurves it.

It took what feels like a f*@king eternity but the two Todds finally met and *gasp* had dialogue?! With one another?! This is a high point because it took so effing long. Both actors are fabu and I'm praying they deliver with this storyline. All limbs crossed! Praying!

John and Natty weren't as boring as the day before. That's it...I got nothin' else to say. I'm still hoping he asks her to play darts. Again, instant party. Oh, or his hair can talk...please.

Tea's boobs in her dress.

Just looking at Tomas...

Oh...little Sam. No explanation needed.

Low Points

Blair continues to be written horribly. I mean...granted Kelly NEVER mentions Zane or ever sees him (that may be one of the excuses she uses when she leaves town with Joey soon...she wants to be with Zane), but Blair is pretty effing terrible okay. I mean...I can't even really elaborate on these scenes further. She is just so flippin' dumb. She also needs to find a brain to think with and not her coo-nacha. Ugh.

NQS, Dayt-en, and Dan-YELLA scenes. Why oh why must they be on? And, why did Dan-YELLA have to say Mes' name multiple times? Kill me.

Bruno Mars and Starr. FAIL! Egregious they are gonna try and hook those two up. Maybe they can both get electrocuted handling his speakers? I'm kidding...sort of.

NuJack...he needs to explode right now.

Hopeful Points

Could today have been Dayt-en's last day?!?! Also, in retrospect, the point of her being on this show was?????? Exactly.

This Todd face-off has shit-tons of potential.

Wednesday, July 20th--Vicki's Regal Ass Continues To Rule the Roost

Snap! Is Vickers gonna read that shit out loud to Vickster?

Good God...if anyone is gonna figure out this shit out about Todd it's most def the Man in Black. Word.

This whole Sam/Dorian/Echo thing is hilar.

Blair: "Because I'm a mother and I have eyes in the back of my head." EXPLODE! If anything the virus you are infected with called "stupidity" should have killed you by now...idiot.

I refuse to disucss Starr and Bruno since they have been marinating in shit for weeks and they are too smelly to talk about...

The high point of this party at Toad's is that I'd do Tea...that is all.

Why, I do declare! Miz Kelly Cramer! Mother of Zane! AHHHH!!!!!! I LURVE tulips like nobody's of my top three fav flowers. Lurve she has them at the desk. I've said it once and I'll say it again....Joey/Kelz chemistry is non-existent.

Wait....who is this guy again? This top secret agent just surfaced at Toad Manning's? WTF. Uber confused.

OMG...Dorian and Sam are just cuteness overloads. Times...AS IF this silly string foolishness is for real!!!! I mean....I am so sure THAT shit is holding Echo back!? My ass.

Hilar....Vicki telling Natty about little Sam being missing was comical.

McBain and Sam's cuteness knows no bounds! Seriously! They are like little friends and I lurve it.

God bless....another agent showed up at Toad's. I am so confused. I haven't read spoilers on this so I don't know jack shit.

Tea thinks Dan-YELLA ditched Sam's party to do the nasty at the Minuteman. Ugh this convo just kinda got awkward. Ummmmmmm Dan-YELLA just asked where "Dad"! He's at the front door? Y'all don't hear all that commotion going on out front? Fail, OLTL.

Sweet Lord...Lone Ranger and Tonto!!!!! John McBain you are fabulous this week!!!

Ugh I need this two Todds storyline to improve!!! Aaaaaaaaand Tomas, Starr, Bruno, and NuJack don't hear the agent yelling at the two Todds just feet away outside the front door? BALLS!!!!!

I wish Vicki would say "Hey bitches, let's play darts." I can dream.

Wait...I hate these agents. They remind me of people from "The Twilight Zone." RH: "Why are there 2 Todd Mannings?" Geez Louise...tell me! Been wondering for forever!

I will say that Kelly looks gorg in her little outfit! Uber fabu! This Kelly and Joey thing ain't holding my attention. I mean....Gina Tognoni is SUPER FAB yet they are wasting her talent. Sad...

I mean....what kind of silly string is this?! They did not make this when I was growing up! Thank God...otherwise I would have been shooting that shit left and right. Dorian and Echo are utter deliciousness. OMIGOD...McBain is BEYOND CUTE with little Sam!!! Dear God in heaven!!!! CANNOT DEAL!!!!!

In case y'all forgot...Blair likes to have sex.

Good they knocked out RH?! NOOOO!!!!! I need this story to progress! I don't need the same shit...let's move this along, bitches! Now!

Vicki at least has a normal reaction to the body at she and Tea. That is it! Everyone else thinks it's normal. Good God.

Wait...I am so confused with this Todd shit!!!!!! Soooo TSJ is acting like he REALLY IS the real Todd? Did these bastards brainwash him a long time ago to make him believe he was/is Todd Manning but he really isn't? What the f*@k, y'all? I am so bloody confused!!!

AWWWWWW HELL! So NOW Tea and Dan-YELLA hear something outside and it's Toad's cell ringing. Yet, they didn't hear the commotion earlier. My ass. ADORBS..."here I am!" Little warm my heart.

Is anyone else absolutely DYING for RH and Vickster to have a scene?! Ugh...agony! I NEED this to happen soon. Woof.

LURVE IT!!! Vickers to Natty: "So you'll excuse me if I don't wanna play round 2 of the deflection game hosted by you, Natalie, where I'm just a losing contestant. SOMEONE has got to do some police work. So Vicki, you're welcome to stay here and go for the bonus round but I don't have time to stand here and listen to Natalie's long winded metaphors about operating tables and game shows." I LOVE THIS!!!!!!!!!! I don't wanna listen to Natty blab, either...word. Vicki's face was priceless, too. Awe snap!!! There is Dorian!

Blair...yes, you WILL let his ass out of your sight again. Your suckiness as a mother (and your sucking with men...interpret as you wish) is perpetual.

Ok so WTF with these agents? I mean...RH FINALLY starts interacting with people and now he is bound and gagged by these effing agents again? Jesus H. Christ....this story moves along and then it takes two steps back. WOOF.

Absurd....Joey is clearly below the drinking age, OLTL. What kind of an example does this set for all the viewers below the legal drinking age? I'm disappointed in you writers. Aaaaand Kelly and Joey will have sex. I mean...good for them. Joey is too young for all this but whatevs...

I am actually loving David and Dorian today. Not too hokey...nice. YES...Dorian, you are so right. The Minuteman is indeed a cest pool. Le woof!

Ok, so Sam's cake does not look very tasty. Plus, I mean...does this child have any friends? Where are some other kids? What a lame party? I mean...Starr is serving the cake to the child alone. FAIL.

Peeing...Vicki (mouthing): "Dorian! Apologize!" I love it. Oh no she didn't...Dorian said she loved to see David walk away?! Lordy.

WHAT THE F*@K?! Firstly, that was such a pansy ass way to hold a gun! Then, the agent shot Todd? What in the hell is going on? Oh, and any agent that shoots that way should in turn be shot. Good God.

Ross Rayburn on the Cymbalta commercial! What What!

There is a lot of sex going on at LaBoulaie this evening. Now we just need Blair to do some random guy she finds on the street to complete the trifecta. Unless....Addie has a man in the attic that we don't know about...hmmm.

Well at least Vickster saw the picture of RH. *Sigh* I need interaction.

I want to shove Starr's face into that damn cake.

Good God Almighty....I NEED John to read the note on his desk regarding the truth about McBundle because, lemme tell ya, I need that effing storyline to end. So tired of this shit.

RH will live, obviously, but WTF. I mean...seriously.

There was no sign of Dayt-en today so hopefully she went to Cali to find her mother and pursue a career in porn. Word. to get ready for work!!! See y'all this evening or in the morning!


China Lake


  1. Wow, I thought these episodes were awesome, definitely a lot better than these last couple weeks! They did ask us to suspend reality for a while to make some of these stories work....

    First of all, my cousin has those Spiderman shooters and that stuff is weak! Echo must be the weakest human being on the face of the earth, which I doubt since she knocked Dorian out and drug her out to this motel! And why did she step back in fear against the wall? Little Sam is not that intimidating!

    And also there was the big Mexican standoff outside Todd's house that no one could hear, but could clearly hear Todd's tinny little ringtone? FAIL! But that stuff didn't even matter to me because I was excited about the show again...

    I am very confused by the Todd/Toad stuff as well, but I'm starting think RH isn't the real Todd and that would explain why his memories are only in photographs, like he was fed this history somehow...but the face still wouldn't make sense unless they gave him plastic surgery to look like the old Todd...idk they better have a better explanation than that...And then they shot him! What?!

    Vickers cracked me up so much the whole episode!

    And for me, it was Tea's everything in that dress...sigh...

  2. Joey still looks like Bob Saget to me. Love Dorian and I always will :)

  3. Of course Addie has a man in the attic. That is why Renee was spotted on the streets of NY...Addie kicked her out.

    David and Vicki thing all week. Sam on screen is not far behind.


  4. @YoSammity Agreed...these episodes were MUCH needed and they were all kinds of FABU. Thank you Vicki and Dorian...just thank you. YAY! Confirmation that the Spiderman silly string is a total crock! I love having you around YoSammity! Oh, and I just snorted at my desk when I reread your post...a big Mexican standoff that no one could hear!!! HAHAHAHAHA! I will have to use that (I'll give you credit, don't fret). Yes, then they heard Todd's tiny phone ring...epic fail. I'm lost with the RH/TSJ stuff, too. I mean...TSJ acts like he is the real Todd. But, I don't know how they can make this work if RH isn't the real Todd. But they are kinda acting like he's not? My mind changes daily. The more I see of this the more confused I get. Lordy. Agreed with Vickers. Normally I think he is too over the top but lately he has been cracking my ass up. Agreed about Tea and the dress...word yo.

    @Katie PEEING...I told Ross you said that about Joey and he agrees! He does remind me of him...that tall, lanky, awkward, goofy look. I lurve Dorian, too. I PRAY her send off is proper...deserves it! Gonna miss her. :(

    @Christie hahahahaha! Good point about Addie! Poor Renee is street walking (I know what you are talking about with her being spotted on the streets of NY). OMG...David and Vicki are HILARIOUS! I can't get enough. Vicki is very funny with David. Sam is adorable and I just want to munch on him. Too presh for words. We need our Bo back right? :( Whann!