RH: "Blair, I'm really disappointed. Not only are you a shitty mother, but you have just become a really stupid, pathetic, gullable, and horny character. I can't believe I came back for this foolishness.
Evening!!!! I had to work late and then was looking at honeymoon destinations. Anyway, I'm JUST now sitting down to Monday's episode. Sooooooo....in order to catch up I'm going to do a combined drive-by of Monday. Going to TRY and stick with 10 bullet points. Yes, short but I'm pressed for time and need to catch up! Then...either tonight or tomorrow (yes tomorrow monring...I don't have to go run tomorrow) I'll blog about Tuesday. I'll be all caught up and can blog fully about tomorrow! WORD! Sorry...work is hectic through next week. Oh, and my wedding. Losing.My.Mind.
Monday, July 11th--David's Casual (hello?! That maroon shirt and jeans?! As if!) Version of Events
1. This Robin Strasser storyline is insulting. She is a fierce bitch...let's treat her like one, writers. Please.
2. I loathe Jess but "The truth? That's never meant a damn thing to you." Possibly the truest words I have ever heard. Natty is a liar. I don't care about these scenes, and now I'm getting pissy with Natalie. PISSY! And, I don't like Jess AT ALL. I will say that most agree with Natty when she said that she thinks she likes Tess better.
3. When Brody starts going off the handle I'd love to be a piece of lint on his clothing so I can witness this foolishness firsthand.
4. Whoever is NuJack's acting coach needs to be taken out like Mes in the most violent manner possible. Like chainsaws, hacksaws, knives, you name it...beyond done being somewhat mild. I need them to be removed now.
5. I couldn't take it anymore so I just called ADT and requested a security system be installed at Llanfair. I told them to look for the most sophisticated bitch on the planet. They will find Vicki quick, yo. Oh...they are supposedly going to LaBoulaie tomorrow to set up the same system. FYI.
6. Starr's appearance in this episode is BEYOND pointless. I mean...we couldn't have a Blair and Tea convo? Of course...that would be just too effing cool.
7. RH has GOT to stop this self-dialogue foolishness. Plus, a Vicki/Todd scene is like two months overdue. Right, cri*cri?! Oh, and Bree is like a mini woman! My God! Her little dress...adorbs.
8. It's NQS! It's MES! NO!!!!!!!! It's Agent Kent!!!!! UGH. I mean...why can't that damn dead body be Mes? Or NQS? God is obviously not on "Team Mary-Ella" this episode....
9. Highlight of this episode: Dorian mentioned she was a doctor. I just can't get enough of those references.
10. Who wants to get popcorn (easy on the salt and heavy on the butter) and sit back with John McBain as he listens to the tape recorder? This bitch does!
11. I can't keep it to 10 bullets. DAMMIT VICKI! I cannot have you babying Natty. I will not accept this. Dammit to hell.
12. I JUST picked up my jaw off the floor. Hearing RH carry on a damn regular convo caused me to go into shock and have a seziure.
13. SUH-NAP!!!!!!!! A Tina Lord reference?!?! OH.EM.GEE! Be still my heart! I'd pray for a Tina Lord cameo. Oh...and Natty can't leave Brody alone cause she is horny, Jess. You know that.
14. David's account of events to Brody and John was HILAR!!!
15. I'm sorry but I miss Clint, Bo, Nora, Renee, etc. at the mansion. I don't care about Echo and Rex hanging out there...ugh.
16. Origami Cogs...so effing tired of hearing this shit. More annoying...Gigi and her hair sitting in "Asa's spot" on the mantle.
17. In case y'all forgot, Blair is as dumb as a box of f*@king rocks and needs to beg the writers to give her decent material.
18. AS F*@KING IF, Toad wouldn't see Todd peering through the window. ABSURD!
19. Also...the coolest person on this episode is clearly John McBain. It's July and he is draped in all black by a pool. If that's not badass then I don't know what it.... ;)
20. I have thought about it and I swear I'll eff any of the writers at OLTL to give Strasser a good exit!!!! "Evicted", Dorian? I don't think David is technically a "tenant." So you are just kicking his ass to the curb.
21. Ugh...don't worry Jolie fans: John and Natty will most def be together...UGH!
22. Rex threatening Blair and Tea....OVER this shit!!!! OVER it!!!!!!
23. NuJack and his online searching skills? exactly.
This episode could have been all kinds of better, but compared to the shit show we have been seeing recently...it was A-O.K.!!! I'll take what I can get!
K...going to bed now. See y'all in the morning. MUST blog about Tuesday's episode!
LOVE you all and MEAN it!
Marty "tardy for the blogging party" Saybrooke