Ambien or Something Like It...

Confused by my title? I would be, as well, so you aren't alone. I lovingly gave the post this title since basically, this episode was like taking an Ambien...with a glass of wine. I was asleep from the beginning. I'm gonna try to make some lemonade out of the lemons that were thrown on my screen today. Basically, the only scenes worth watching were the ones in the last segment (minus the teens of course). So, lemme try and tweak out a decent post here. It's taking me a full glass of cabernet to get through it...

Ok, so maybe I was too excited about the Jolie shotgun wedding. I know I bashed shotgun weddings but I love John and Natalie so I was pretty pumped about it. And, I was waiting on Marty to storm the courtroom and stop the damn thing. (SIDENOTE: Did anyone notice that Marty hardly talked the whole episode? So bizarre! I mean, of course, she had a dialogue with herself and other inantimate objects at Llanfair and Capricorn but she really didn't utter a word to another living, breathing human being until the very end when she said "Stop the Wedding!" She just stared at people the whole hour. I found that odd.) Anyway...I just found all the dialogue between John and Brody kinda boring. I will say that it was very touching that Jessica gave Natalie the necklace Asa gave her for sweet sixteen. Very sentimental. Additionally, I am upset Nat's family isn't there. I'm sorry, this bothers me. I mean, really? Vicki can't attend? Neither can Clint? Roxy? Rex? Let's all get real. Oh, and so Natalie just had that God awful ugly dress in her closet? It looked like something Vicki wore to one of her previous weddings. It was hideous. Of course, Natalie looked beautiful because she just is that gorgeous, but the dress! OMG. It's like a marshmallow just melted all over her, solidified, and then some cheap-ass designer decided to call it a dress, and of course the wardrobe department at OLTL snagged it off the rack. Anyway, I hope Monday is better. I definitely think it will be since there is a Marty/Natalie confrontation so I am def beside myself with excitement.

Again, anything decent happened in the last segment in case I haven't beaten that horse to death. That being said: I think Cutter is super attractive in that "you know he is a dirty, bad guy but he could show you a good time" kind of way. I can't wait for him to stir things up. Damn, Aubrey attacks a man when she kisses him right? She did the same thing to Joey at the airport. I'm still confused as to what she and Cutter are up to. I guess maybe they are conspiring to get ahold of the Buchanan fortune? Hell, maybe Clint isn't that paranoid after all. I may be inserting my foot in my mouth soon since I have just rambled on and on about how worried Clint is about protecting all things Buch. We shall see.

I felt sorry for Joey and Kelly today. They are both so cute...BUT, Joey should have known better. Yes, Aubrey shouldn't be cheating on him but come on? You hardly know this blonde Barbie that you met while galavanting through Europe. What do you expect? Maybe I'm a hard ass but at the end of the day, Joey did this to himself. Otherwise, regarding this episode, not too much happened with these two at Capricorn.

I think more is gonna happen with Christian and Blair Monday so I'll discuss them then.

Oh, are you wondering why I haven't discussed the teen scene? It's because I can't. If so, I'll get physically ill. I'll break out into hives and start convulsing. Seriously, I have an excuse from my doctor. Grrrrrr...Ok, I promised to make some lemonade if possible. Ummm...the James/Starr kiss was sweet? That's all I got. The thing is (before people get offended or upset why I don't discuss them) is just that they were shoved down our throats for months! Literally. And, the dialogue is just HORRENDOUS! I mean, Lang and Starr at LaBoulle (eh...don't know how to spell it) are so effing boring. I'd rather gouge my eyes out a la Oedipus Rex (for all those Sophocles and Greek tragedy fans out there). It's disgraceful and a shame because OLTL has the BEST vet scene on all soaps and they were hardly used most of the year. Thankfully, the vets have been utilized lately. Maybe I'm still on a Bo/Nora high from Monday and Tuesday but if you are gonna pull them or some of their peers from the next episode that's fine but it just needs some balance. Put some of them on the show for crying out loud! Not just a show with all teens that could be featured on ABC Family. I mean, where is Dorian? Vicki? Charlie? Echo? Clint? Renee? (Hey! Clint was going to the Palace to wish Renee a Happy New Year the other day so we know she is alive! Thank God!) Look, I'm just saying I can't watch a show filled with practically all teens and there are no scenes with vets...any of them. Wait, I know Kassie DePaiva counts but she didn't do much this episode. Anyway, the shows that have the highest ratings don't display teens predominantly. That's my two cents on that.

Sorry if I was somewhat of a Debbie Downer on this post, but that is how the episode made me feel. The whole thing was just a filler episode and everything that I needed to get out of today's show was given to me in the last segment (or some of yesterday's show). Granted this happens every now and then with ALL soaps, so it's no big deal at all. Still, it's just a bummer when it happens. I'm looking forward to next week and am optimistic and hopeful for what the New Year will bring for my all time fav soap! Oh, and ummmm Vickers returns Tuesday bitches! Whoop Whoop! One of my wishes already granted!

I may write another post this week about my hopes and wishes for OLTL in 2011, but I just need to see if I have time. I will def let you know. Nevertheless, I wish EVERYONE a safe, happy, and fun-filled New Year!

Cheers friends! I'm toasting you with a glass of wine now! Until next time...

Mary-Ella