Have a Seat!

That damn commercial! I was peeing on myself! How hilarious. God, can you imagine if all infomercials were like that? I'd love it. The face of David when he had hemorrhoids...LMAO.

Despite the commercial being 10 shades of funny, I must say (and I cannot believe I am saying this) that there was too much Vickers today. Yes, I know. I haven't shut my damn mouth about how happy I am for him to return; however, there was too much silly jibberish with him today as he just stared right into the camera. Then, the dialogue with guards and the spoons...could have done without. I would have rather that time be filled with some Vicki/Dorian, Bo/Clint, or Matthew/Nora scenes...oh well. I'm ready for him to go after Clint...and Rex. Hopefully, there will be no David soliloquies tomorrow. I'd rather see a meaty Clint/Vickers scene. Oh, and that picture of Dorian on the wall that he made out of sidewalk chalk? LMAO.

But...it's about time Rex feel guilty enough to want to say something to Bo! Hello you ungrateful little thing...Bo has done so much for you since you moved to Llanview. He practically reformed you...Help him! So, if Rex was gonna have to get the hint to start to come to his senses and help Bo then hell, why not make it through a Vickers infomercial? I will say that I could have done without Gigi in the bed with him. Boo. Just boo on her. And boo on her hair...ugh.

Bo is STILL being an idiot which I guess I'm okay with since it is simply a plot point. BUT...the good thing about today is that at least he made Clint...dare I say it...seem like he was starting to feel guilty!?!? Bo was layin' it on thick (like how my hips get after the holidays thick). I noticed today that on some message boards that Bo is still getting flack for not feeling guilty/sorry enough. I don't think it's that, I still think he is like "WTF, I'm so confused. How did this happen? My life was great and now it's shit. The love of my life just kicked me out of our house since our son told her of my fling with my assistant. WTF." That kinda thing. Oh, and hold the damn phone (literally) Bo heard Vickers-Buchanan on the phone...yay!!!! Sidenote: I LOVE the Buchanan study. Always have. So stylish and chic. I love all the blue willow china in the background. Probably Renee's influence, no doubt. Miss her. Ok...back to Bo and Clint. Again, glad Clint is feelin' guilty (sort of) but I mean really? Bo, you just cheated on the love of your life that you just got back together with after 10 years of separation. Oh, and your son SAW YOU with Inez yet you want to sit around and shoot the shit with your big bro' (who pulled a shotgun at your wedding and the previous Christmas) and tell him your sorry and drink Asa's good bourbon. Don't get me wrong, I love bourbon and I'd drink my sorrows away, too, but come on!!! Go on and on about how bad you feel...ugh writers...just ugh. Oh, and I did love when Bo saw David on tv he was like "look it's David!" and Clint's paranoid ass started looking in every direction. It was funny...watch it again if you missed it. Sidenote: It may sound crazy but it's worth watching the show over again. I catch a lot of things I missed the first time. Hell, I have watched it three times. Anyway, I appreciate the show more usually once I rewatch it.

Oh Vicki...never a hair out of place. You even show up at someone's doorstep at midnight looking ever so chic. I'm not surprised since the woman is infallible. I love this dynamic of Dorian and Vicki but again I have to ask...why does Dorian want to go after Echo so badly?? This has been explained rather poorly. There has been no decent explanation given to the viewers. Dorian loathes Vicki. There has to be a better reason than she just wants Charlie and Vicki together. I'm just not buying it. Oh well, I love Vicki and Dorian in the same room so let's keep it coming.

She's dead?! REALLY Natalie? REALLY? God...ever since you slept with Brody you have become so effing stupid. Ah...I can't take this madness. I know on other boards people are asking which team are you on: Marty or Natalie. Well, as much as I want Natalie to be happy, I have to say I'm on Team Marty. She's just too fun to watch crazy. Therefore, I need her downward spiral to continue so I can enjoy it. I love the crazy ass look she gets in her eyes when she is yelling at Natalie. God, I wonder if she is like that in real life?! Geez...can you imagine if you were her kid and she looked at you the way she does Natalie and was like "Clean your room or ELSE!" Seriously, close your eyes and imagine yourself at the age of 8 and Marty "not gonna be tardy for the party" Saybrooke is towering over you and screaming that in your face. I just officially got scared of her. Sorry...I got off topic. But, I'm ready for the Natalie kidnapping scenes to unfold. However, how is she gonna redeem herself to John with all this? I mean, if she kidnaps Martyr and holds her at gunpoint at the Buchanan Lodge...how can John forgive that? He actually does care about Marty and I mean, he is chief of detectives. That should be interesting. Even if Marty delivers Natalie's baby, the truth will have to come out about why they are at the lodge. Oh, and I'm gonna wait on this Jessica's baby is at risk discussion since I don't know enough about it. But...I will say that now I most DEF think that Jessica's baby is indeed the spawn of movie buff, male whore turned loving romantic bf to that whore Langston (overnight change I might add), Robert Ford. So, this oughta get interestin'...

Wow...Matthew and Nora...alone...in a scene...together?! Has hell frozen over? This hasn't happened since around 2006, right after Nora's house fire. Gosh, she and Matt are my favorite parent/child duo. Remember from 2002 to like 2006 when she and Matt were BFFs. Gosh and he helped her through the Daniel Coulson fiasco? He used to melt my heart! For awhile I forgot she was his mother! Oh, and I'm so feelin' the way Nora does. Ugh...I've done the same thing after a break up. She is just being mopey...don't blame her. Anyway, Matt was such a doll...kissing her hand...ah! What a sweet child...he still is good deep down despite his little punk-ass bitch streak as of recently. But...I'm upset cause he had the PERFECT opportunity to tell Nora about Clint! UGH this is driving me nuts.

Despite my favorite characters being on today, there really wasn't too much progress today. It was just a lot of talk while David was hanging out in Morocco. But, I'll take a day with vets any day. Damn, Nate is on tomorrow. Ugh. Oh, and Dan-yella now wears glasses?! WTF. I know I saw the promo for tomorrow's show correctly cause I rewound that part. Blair and Christian...I know they wake up together but I wonder if they actually had sex. I haven't heard if they do or not. Yay...Bo and Nora finally come face to face. Sidenote: I effin LOVE the hunter green coat she has on in tomorrow's episode. She only wore it once last season which is a shame cause it looks so pretty on her. That and her winter white one are my favorite. I want them both! Ok...that was my vain and shallow comment for the evening.

See you kids tomorrow! Off to watch the Sugar Bowl!
ME

The Snoop!

Bonjour!!!! Hope everyone had a fun-filled and SAFE New Year! I don't know about y'all but I was looking forward to 2011--for my own life AND OLTL! I think the show is on the upswing so I'm ready for some drama. Anyway, without further adieu here is my post...spoilers mentioned, darlings. =-)

How about a big WTF and LOL with "The Snoop!" Ah! I know this isn't the most noteworthy thing to report about today's show but it was hilarious. The one thing I've always LOVED about OLTL is the humor. I love all the joking and one liners the show throws out. The Snoop thing was funny and much needed comedic relief. Speaking of Snoop, I wonder who OLTL will have as it's next special guest star?! Thoughts???

Ok, Joey is a complete and total tool. Yes, it's a damn shame but true. Ya know, I liked him in the beginning. I thought, "wow OLTL, what a great job of replacing Nathan Fillion's Joey" but something has gone awry quickly!!! Ah! I think it's just the writing? I mean, Joey has always been impestuous and kind of a goober but they are making him look like a complete and total dumbass. Aubrey is obviously playing him like a deck of cards with this Cutter character.

Speaking of Aubrey, she needs to get out of that heinous romper/onesie/jumper or whatever the hell you want to call it. I didn't like it on her cause she is too short. I haven't seen many spoilers on all this but I'm guessing she and Cutter are out to play Joey (which they are doing beautifully) and try and get ahold of the Buch fortune? I guess?? So, looks like my foot will be inserted in my mouth maybe in a few weeks. Clint is not being that paranoid. Everyone does indeed want a piece of the Buchanan pie. Oh, and just for good measure I have to say that ummmm Aubrey is a whore. Yes, I'm a woman and I shouldn't throw it around but I am on this one. What a skank! Hooked up with Ford, Cutter is her boyfriend and she is also sleeping with her "fiance." In my book, that at least gets herself a nomination for the "Whore of Llanview" but since I'm a bitch I'll probably give it to Langston. ;)

So, obviously Cutter and Kelly are gonna have a discussion in the near future since he was creepily staring at her at Capricorn. Maybe poor Kelly will FINALLY have some chemistry on the show with someone...why not Cutter? I don't know how long term his character is, but I know Aubrey has to be kept around since she is on contract. Hello, she is in the opening with a NEW PICTURE! Ah...I've said it before and I'll say it again...please get the older characters new pics!!!! Speaking of pictures, I sure hope Rex gets his hands on a copy of the French mag with the pic of Cutter and Aubrey. Glad Kelly is onto her ass. I believe Cutter is the one that is gonna be key in all of this. Who knows, maybe he will fall for Kelly?

Christian and Blair? At least they are giving Christian something to do but I am kinda bored by the whole "Layla is cheating on me in Paris with Stefan" and God knows who else thing. Christian is incredibly attractive and he is talented but they have got to find something to do with him. I don't understand this thing with him and Blair since Ted King is getting bought on next week or week after next to be Blair's new love interest (oh, pretty pumped about this...you can just tell they will have chemistry). I just hope they give him a story soon. If they can't figure out what to do with him, then just get rid of him. I'm not about people losing their job, but come on, it's just filler stuff when he is on. Either put up or shut up, TPTB! It's an insult to his character. And this is a character whose family has a rich history with the show...it's a shame to the Vega name!

Jack and Sam Manning...ADORBS!!! I don't care if they were on for all of two minutes...I relished it. I love them and am soooo incredibly sad that Jack has been SORAS'd and now recast!!! GASP! I adore smart ass Jack Manning! You can really tell he is Todd Manning's kid. I can't believe TPTB did this and really don't see the purpose in SORAS'ing the character but oh well. Sam Manning...that cute little thing. His acting is so awkward but I don't care...just want to pinch him. Sidenote: I love Dorian's "white Christmas" theme she has going on in her house. Might do that myself next year. Quite elegant looking. Martha Stewart would be impressed.

Grand Finale: Oh Marty Marty Marty. What a delusional, crazy, dripping mess you have become...please keep it up. If not for the viewers, then solely for my viewing pleasure. Since I know what is coming up with all the Nat/Marty/John drama then this stuff today is boring compared to what's on the rise...hello? Nat holding Marty hostage at the Buchanan lodge?! I'm dying with anticipation! I can't sleep...I can't eat...I'm that effing anxious for this shiz to unfold! And, can we all come to the conclusion that we feel sorry for John? Damn, I still find him attractive (strangely) and Mercury is no longer in retrograde...le' sigh. I don't know what's the matter with me. When all this hits the fan, I just can't feel sorry for Natalie. This is unlike old Natalie to go on lying like this for months but this new Natalie pisses me off. She should have just bitten the bullet and laid all this out on the table a LONG time ago...I mean, why not? She didn't even cheat on John for crying out loud. Ugh...anyway, I'm looking forward for all this.

Oh, and I must say maybe my New Year's wish is coming true fellow OLTL'ers! Did anyone notice something totally unusual about the show today?? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller? (kidding) Seriously, there were NO TEENS!!!!! AH! I'm so damn happy! I just hope this is foreshadowing for the upcoming year.

Kinda like Wednesday's show, there wasn't too much to discuss about today's episode. Looking forward to tomorrow since we got....drum roll please...DAVID VICKERS BUCHANAN!!! Hells yes! Is it annoying that he only comes back to OLTL sporadically when he is not taping "Desperate Housewives?" Yes, but I couldn't care less. If this was anyone else, I'd bitch and complain but I just can't get enough of Vickers humor...bring it! And, thankfully, we get some much needed vet time with Vicki, Dorian, Nora, Bo, and maybe Clint. Can't wait.

Until tomorrow, darlings!
ME

Ambien or Something Like It...

Confused by my title? I would be, as well, so you aren't alone. I lovingly gave the post this title since basically, this episode was like taking an Ambien...with a glass of wine. I was asleep from the beginning. I'm gonna try to make some lemonade out of the lemons that were thrown on my screen today. Basically, the only scenes worth watching were the ones in the last segment (minus the teens of course). So, lemme try and tweak out a decent post here. It's taking me a full glass of cabernet to get through it...

Ok, so maybe I was too excited about the Jolie shotgun wedding. I know I bashed shotgun weddings but I love John and Natalie so I was pretty pumped about it. And, I was waiting on Marty to storm the courtroom and stop the damn thing. (SIDENOTE: Did anyone notice that Marty hardly talked the whole episode? So bizarre! I mean, of course, she had a dialogue with herself and other inantimate objects at Llanfair and Capricorn but she really didn't utter a word to another living, breathing human being until the very end when she said "Stop the Wedding!" She just stared at people the whole hour. I found that odd.) Anyway...I just found all the dialogue between John and Brody kinda boring. I will say that it was very touching that Jessica gave Natalie the necklace Asa gave her for sweet sixteen. Very sentimental. Additionally, I am upset Nat's family isn't there. I'm sorry, this bothers me. I mean, really? Vicki can't attend? Neither can Clint? Roxy? Rex? Let's all get real. Oh, and so Natalie just had that God awful ugly dress in her closet? It looked like something Vicki wore to one of her previous weddings. It was hideous. Of course, Natalie looked beautiful because she just is that gorgeous, but the dress! OMG. It's like a marshmallow just melted all over her, solidified, and then some cheap-ass designer decided to call it a dress, and of course the wardrobe department at OLTL snagged it off the rack. Anyway, I hope Monday is better. I definitely think it will be since there is a Marty/Natalie confrontation so I am def beside myself with excitement.

Again, anything decent happened in the last segment in case I haven't beaten that horse to death. That being said: I think Cutter is super attractive in that "you know he is a dirty, bad guy but he could show you a good time" kind of way. I can't wait for him to stir things up. Damn, Aubrey attacks a man when she kisses him right? She did the same thing to Joey at the airport. I'm still confused as to what she and Cutter are up to. I guess maybe they are conspiring to get ahold of the Buchanan fortune? Hell, maybe Clint isn't that paranoid after all. I may be inserting my foot in my mouth soon since I have just rambled on and on about how worried Clint is about protecting all things Buch. We shall see.

I felt sorry for Joey and Kelly today. They are both so cute...BUT, Joey should have known better. Yes, Aubrey shouldn't be cheating on him but come on? You hardly know this blonde Barbie that you met while galavanting through Europe. What do you expect? Maybe I'm a hard ass but at the end of the day, Joey did this to himself. Otherwise, regarding this episode, not too much happened with these two at Capricorn.

I think more is gonna happen with Christian and Blair Monday so I'll discuss them then.

Oh, are you wondering why I haven't discussed the teen scene? It's because I can't. If so, I'll get physically ill. I'll break out into hives and start convulsing. Seriously, I have an excuse from my doctor. Grrrrrr...Ok, I promised to make some lemonade if possible. Ummm...the James/Starr kiss was sweet? That's all I got. The thing is (before people get offended or upset why I don't discuss them) is just that they were shoved down our throats for months! Literally. And, the dialogue is just HORRENDOUS! I mean, Lang and Starr at LaBoulle (eh...don't know how to spell it) are so effing boring. I'd rather gouge my eyes out a la Oedipus Rex (for all those Sophocles and Greek tragedy fans out there). It's disgraceful and a shame because OLTL has the BEST vet scene on all soaps and they were hardly used most of the year. Thankfully, the vets have been utilized lately. Maybe I'm still on a Bo/Nora high from Monday and Tuesday but if you are gonna pull them or some of their peers from the next episode that's fine but it just needs some balance. Put some of them on the show for crying out loud! Not just a show with all teens that could be featured on ABC Family. I mean, where is Dorian? Vicki? Charlie? Echo? Clint? Renee? (Hey! Clint was going to the Palace to wish Renee a Happy New Year the other day so we know she is alive! Thank God!) Look, I'm just saying I can't watch a show filled with practically all teens and there are no scenes with vets...any of them. Wait, I know Kassie DePaiva counts but she didn't do much this episode. Anyway, the shows that have the highest ratings don't display teens predominantly. That's my two cents on that.

Sorry if I was somewhat of a Debbie Downer on this post, but that is how the episode made me feel. The whole thing was just a filler episode and everything that I needed to get out of today's show was given to me in the last segment (or some of yesterday's show). Granted this happens every now and then with ALL soaps, so it's no big deal at all. Still, it's just a bummer when it happens. I'm looking forward to next week and am optimistic and hopeful for what the New Year will bring for my all time fav soap! Oh, and ummmm Vickers returns Tuesday bitches! Whoop Whoop! One of my wishes already granted!

I may write another post this week about my hopes and wishes for OLTL in 2011, but I just need to see if I have time. I will def let you know. Nevertheless, I wish EVERYONE a safe, happy, and fun-filled New Year!

Cheers friends! I'm toasting you with a glass of wine now! Until next time...

Mary-Ella

Role Reversal...10 Years in the Making

Obviously, this whole episode pretty much centered around my favorite couple so I'll save that discussion for the finale. That's what the entitled quote is all about so more of that later...

How Are We Gonna Get That Little Gold Digger, Aubrey, Out of Joey's Life? Go get her Clint! Have at it. I haven't trusted Aubrey for one damn minute. Is Clint super creepy paranoid about all things Buchanan related lately? Hell yes. But this is one philly he is right about! I'll discuss Aubrey's sneaky ass in a second.

I'm glad Clint asked Vicki for help with his scheme. No, I don't think it's some novel idea, but I just like JVD and ES onscreen together. And, now that I'm venturing off topic I'll just go on and jump off the cliff, I want them to get together. That's right, I'm done with Charlie Banks. Finished! Ciao! Au revoir! He has overdosed on the stupidity kool-aid and I'm fine with him and Echo hooking up. I don't want them to leave the screen (although those are the rumors circulating) but those together would be fine. Vicki would be pissed and so would Dorian and then Vicki and Clint can test their waters. Not to mention, if Echo and Charlie remained onscreen, then tons of drama. Everyone would win. But, like I've said before, if Clint and Vicki do hook-up then Clint will have to be redeemed before all this happens. Or, Vicki could start to have feelings for him since he may help her with her Charlie situation and then shiz will hit the fan when she finds out about all his contriving things all shades of evil. However, she may want to help him and redeem him. Whew! I'm exhausted from that tangent.

2 things about this upcoming Jolie wedding that gives me the red ass: 1. $5 says Roxy isn't invited and I'm gonna be pissed!!!!!! Ugh. She raised Nat for God's sake. Tell her! 2. I don't know how I feel about a shotgun wedding. Maybe cause I'm from a small town in north Louisiana and I try and steer away from those...I dunno. That's my 2 cents. Oh, let's talk John. It's like within the past two weeks John decided that he was going to do a 180 for the first time ever since his tenure on the show and decide to be a spontaneous, loving, caring, romantic man. I'm all about a lovely man (thankfully I'm engaged to one...shout-out cause he reads this, but seriously he is), but this is just strange. It's as if all of a sudden I'm starting to find John....er...um...eh...attractive? Dear angels in heaven...did I just type that? No, I don't like long hair on a man but he is all of a sudden attractive to me...when did this madness begin? Do y'all know my answer to this? Mercury is in retrograde until December 30th. So peeps, I'm betting that my strange attraction to John McBain will dwindle after the New Year. I mean, let's be serious, how can the same girl (me) find both Bo Buchanan (yes, in an older attractive way and he's sweet) and John handsome? That just doesn't happen. Damn, lemme get back on track, sorry. Anyway, I'm not gonna lie I kinda wanted a big ole Texas Buchanan affair for John and Natalie but c'est la vie. At least we have....drum roll please...

Marty "ain't gonna be tardy for the party" Saybrooke! Ah! I even enjoyed her creepy eavesdropping. Again, her dialogue with the elevator buttons is more entertaining than any Starr/Lang dialogue. Writers: when in doubt, Martyr conversing with inantimate objects is more appealling than the teens...believe me! This is my humble cry! I'm gonna love Marty trying to crash that wedding...bring it on! I will say this though, poor thing does receive bad tidings all the time. I mean, John comes up to her and asks how she's doing and she is like well Cole made it through his first Christmas in prison....then John's like "oh, I'm marrying Natalie." This bitch can't catch a break...dayum!

Kelly has got a hot little body on her. You know, both she and Joey are two incredibly attractive people...seriously. However, does anyone else feel they are both monumentally awkward? I'm talking awkwardness of epic proportions here. They def have chemistry though and I hope it goes somewhere. I do. They haven't had any intense dialogue yet, though. Most of their discussions have revolved around Kelly's mishaps. So, I'm gonna wait and discuss them once they have talked more. All I will say is, yes I believe they still have that "spark."

Poor, poor, poor Christian. Tears. Do they just not know what to do with him? And, please dear God do NOT tell me that he and Layla broke up today over the phone cause of her pic in the French mag. (Sidenote: I'm so effing sure Llanview carries that French mag at the palace hotel) I'm gonna wait until tomorrow for more about this cause I know he and Blair makeout and all. But, seriously. Chris and Layla were an established loving couple and for them to break up over the telephone, or at least like this, is insulting to the characters and the story. Just sad.

Ok, is it me or does Rex ALWAYS have to snoop at the Palace Hotel and does he ALWAYS wind up under the bed hiding once the person arrives? Really? I do love Rex (WITHOUT Gigi). I do. I know some don't but he is funny and loveable and he has substance. I want him to dig up more on Aubrey though. Speaking of Aubrey, ok what is this pic about? Someone on a message board mentioned something about nude pics, but they showed her in the mag and she was dressed and holding on to someone....Cutter perhaps??? Which, I'm 100% convinced that Cutter is def the person she keeps talking to. However, I don't understand what kinda deal they got going on...hmmm

Grand Finale...it's rare, very rare, when a couple or a moment on tv can make me physically hurt with pain. Thanks Bo and Nora....you did it today. Am I in 9th grade again????? Is this 1999???? Thankfully, there was no Woman of the Year ceremony in this episode. Bo actually gets to take a walk in Nora's shoes...About. Dayum. Time. My chest literally tightened and my eyes watered today. Gosh, if I didn't know they were gonna get back together I'd have been drowing in tears. Dayum. (As if their first break up wasn't bad enough, I STILL can't watch that) Back to the story, this whole thing played out completely differently than I anticipated. I was expecting a screaming match! An, "I've been telling you she wanted to get you into bed" tirade with a bunch of "I told you so's." But, it was even flippin better. Everything was subtle and I loved it. Nora is still in total shock and who can blame her (hell, she was kidnapped, molested and in a car wreck...enough for a lifetime). I'll give it to HBS, she did phenomenal. I felt like I had been cheated on...good lord! For some reason, she looked more pitiful during the whole thing since she was in her bathrobe. The biggest thing she pointed out, and biggest obstacle they will have to face, is that he ONLY told her because he got caught. I know he didn't sleep with Inez, yada yada yada, but he THINKS he did and he decided NOT to tell her. Big mistake, Bo, courtesy of your big bro but shame on you, commish, you know better! So, even when Nora finds out the truth she should still bring this up and this should be an issue. Let's see if the writers have their chops. I'll say this...best quote of the whole thing was "How long did it take you to forgive me, Bo? A decade? It took you ten years to forgive me. How long is it supposed to take for me to forgive you? I don’t know." BOOM! I love you, Bo, but this is so deserved from this angle...sorry.

Bo, Bo, Bo. Bo has been getting a lot of flack for not being "guilty" enough but I disagree. I think he feels incredibly guilty. You can tell it is absolutely killing him to discuss this with Nora. But at the end of the day, I think he just honestly doesn't know what in the hell is goin on and how all these events happened and now his life is out of control! And, I think he is just terrified that Nora won't forgive him. Hell, I'd be scared, too. I just think he is just so confused by all of it and trying to piece some of it together because, like he said today, "none of this makes sense." That's right! It doesn't make sense at all. My biggest issue with their scenes today, otherwise they were PERF, was that he didn't even try and say "hey look I know I did this but I really don't remember" instead it came across that he went over there with the intention to smush with Inez and he got drunk and did. That could have been explained a little better.

Another great thing about their scenes, Nora seemed to agree with everything Bo said. From "I love you" to "I'm sorry" to "I'm not gonna give up on us" she continually nodded her head. You can tell they genuinely love each other and are just shocked by the whold situation. AND....he continued to call her "Red" throughout the whole damn fallout. If this were back in the 90's, I feel she would have said for him to not call her that...since she has done it before. But, they are older and wiser now. Anyway, they did superbly as always and I'm just thankful that the rest of their scenes will be on the upswing since this was the worst of it. Ready for the downfall of evil Clint! Then I want Bo and Nora to kick his ass!

See you tomorrow!!!

So You Gonna Replace Me With Another Kid? Just Like You Replaced Mom With Another Woman...

Merry Christmas and My Apologies!

Hope everyone had a lovely Christmas! It is so out of character for me to not post in a timely fashion. Well, let me rephrase that, I'd at least let you know if I was going to be delayed. However, the holidays came and what can I say? It's my first time to have a blog. However, I vow to not do that again. I'll be timely...don't fret! Again, mea culpa...please!

Well, thankfully, last Tuesday and Wednesday were not the greatest episodes. Wait...I loved all the Echo, Dorian, Vicki banter. But, I've said it once and I'll say it thirty more times, I'm so damn tired of the teens. I don't give a damn if Starr, mother of the year that she is, took Hope to see the tree in Angel Square. Her New Year's resolution should be to try and be a better mom, but that's neither here nor there.

So, that being said, I'll discuss some things from yesterday. My post for today's episode (Tuesday) will be up in a bit.

Monday, 12/27/10

As if this is a big surprise, I'm going to begin with my favorite branch of the Buchanan family tree (who by the way all acted perfectly in their scenes). I know Matthew is being a smart alec bastard, but put yourself in his shoes. He ADORES his parents. All his life he wanted them back together. Then, his father who preaches being honest and doing the right thing, cheats on his mother (who he is incredibly close with since it was just the two of them for awhile) with Inez, the mother of the boy he hates more than life right now. So, I don't blame him for being an ass and blabbing to Nora. He is just watching her back and he will always side with her.

Now, the wreck business is a whole other story. I'm not totally sure but I think Matthew will eventually come clean about possibly running Rex and Nora off the road. I dunno. The more this goes on the more I think he may have killed Eddie and maybe Nora saw??? Far-fetched but still.

Bo looks like he hasn't slept in days and he just looks like he wants to cry. He has looked the same way since he left Inez's apartment! Ah! I think this expression has somehow become permanent...ah! He looked devastated when Matt blurted out the news and he looked even worse when he was just looking at Nora nattering on...

Of course, Nora KNEW Bo had cheated when he didn't say anything. Her rambling on in typical Nora fashion was just a way to fill the void until Bo said something and for her to try and think it wasn't real. Ah...heartbreaking.

Clint/Destiny?! OMG...have they ever had a scene together? That was actually my first thought. I thought it was great. Wish they would have more together. I almost feel like Destiny was playing into Clint's conscience a bit. She is always a voice of reason which I love. Eh...Clint/Inez scenes are the same over and over. They usually evolve around Clint saying "Inez, this is what I'll do to you if you don't keep your end of the bargain." Then Inez will say "You wouldn't do that. You wouldn't do something so horrible." REALLY, Whinez?! Really??? I mean after all the shiz he has done to you, you just can't wrap your dense mind around the fact he would do something evil. You're an idiot. I can't wait for you to be slapped next week and hopefully with the good Lord willing you will get some sense knocked into you.

Since everyone is in Angel Square on this fine Monday morning, I'll move on and discuss Darren and Destiny. Poor Darren was trying to do the right thing, but Des just ain't having it. Hell, I don't blame her. My family is dysfunctional and if my boyfriend did that to me then I'd be mad, too. LOVE that she slapped him. So glad OLTL is throwing around the slaps! Sidenote: cannot freakin WAIT until Nora slaps Inez next Wednesday. I'm salivating at the thought. I love pissed off Nora. Back to Destiny, I love her relationship with Matthew. They have the best friendship and they really do "get" each other which is what a true friend does. I don't know if I want them going down a romantic road but their friendship is great.

How hilarious are the lamaze scenes?! haha. John was soooo awkward! I keep asking myself if Michael Easton has ever had to do this in real life with his own family but I just can't imagine it. And, he described a jail cell!!!! LMAO! I love it. Too bad he is gonna want to put Brody's ass in one pretty soon....

I'll discuss Aubrey's sketchiness and Kelly and Rex in the Tuesday discussion. No teens on this episode, except Matthew and Destiny (the only 2 I care about)?! My Christmas miracle! No Starr? Lang? Thank you sweet Lord! And, no Gigi! Ah!!!!! I'm overjoyed and want to go shout from my rooftop (I'll refrain from rooftop cries since it's effing cold in Chicago this evening...ugh). Overall, great episode with all the people I love. Even better is that Tuesday has the same people but with....dum dum dum....MARTY! Woo hoo!

SIDENOTE: Ok, so I love how the writers think we are so stupid when it comes to time in Llanview. Remember last week the doctor's told Nora "oh we are only gonna keep you for a couple more hours" and that was Christmas Eve. Then, she gets discharged from the hospital in this episode and it's NYE already?! WTF? I just don't get this shiz.

My next post will be up tonight...

"You Know I Would Never Give Up On This Marriage. And, I Know You Would Never Sleep With Inez."

Spoilers Mentioned.

Ok, for 3 episodes in a row now Bo looks like he is about to vomit all over the place like a 12 year old that had too much candy and then rode the teacups at Disney 3 times in a row. And, it looks like he never wanted a barf bag more than after Nora said the entitled quote. He has guilt written all over his face! Too bad Nora kicks him to the curb on Tuesday so that doesn't say much about her quote...for the time being, but I know in the end they come together and work to kick the person's ass who is behind all this...CLINT! OMG...he is playing them like fiddles! Clint did ask how Rex was and if he was going to be okay and all but I felt no emotion or genuine concern from him when he said it. Anyway... really Bo?! I mean really? You are going to tell Clint of all effing people that you cheated on Nora? The man who pulled a shotgun on you twice in the past year? (sidenote: how hilarious was the mini potted plant with that stiff balloon Clint strolled in with) I know they have to do this to Bo since it is a plot point but Bo would never be this naive. Oh, and Clint did NOT have a torrid love affair with Echo. It was like a one time thing. What was that about? Speaking of plot points, Jesus, they are making Nora look stupid. This character that is the smartest woman on the show (literally) would NEVER act like this. OMG...where is the Nora from the 90's?! She and Bo are just like "oh, I wonder who would want to break us up?" I want to just jump through the tv at them and shake them. On a positive note, I will say that the writing is clever in the sense that Bo is in the EXACT same position Nora was in in 1998 right down to the hospital bedside setting. Role reversal at its finest. I'm glad because now I feel that Bo and Nora will finally address their problems head-on once they get back together...about time. Their reunion was too quick! Enough of this tirade...

I love that Marty talks to herself out loud. Her conversations with herself are far more entertaining than any Ford/Land dialogue and any Starr/James discussion (which Starr/James please leave the canvas. Oh, and it's obvious James is gay. That's fine...peachy. But he needs to tell Starr and go hook up with someone else). Back to Marty and her Shakespearean-esque soliloquies. She is unraveling more and more each episode and I'm sure that the two people she wanted to see at her doorstep today were both Natalie and Todd....LOL. Eh...Todd going to Marty's was stupid. Granted she loathes Todd but he is trying to think of ANYONE who could have planted those cufflinks...Marty being his first instinct. But let's be serious, it sure as hell wasn't Marty the martyr. I do love him making fun of her, though. Oh, and how awesome is it that whenever Natalie shows up at Marty's office or house she always barges in and demands like a little diva that Martyr's guest or patient get out?! Haha. She kicked Inez out of Martyr's office and now Todd out of her house...lurve this shiz. Keep it up. Yes, I'm calling Marty just "Martyr" now...that wasn't a typo. ;)

Ooohh....Hello Officer Price. I'd like to catch you under the mistletoe. Nice to have you back.

Who is this John?!?! He just pretended to talk like a gingerbread man while talking to Natalie. And, he was affectionate with her! Obviously this behavior can be explained since, remember folks, Mercury is still in retrograde. I kid, I kid. The sad thing is...I think John sincerely LOVES Natalie. This is the first time since John "I have so much emotion I'm going to explode" McBain has told anyone anything remotely romantic. He didn't even do this with Evangeline. Now, as soon as he finally loves someone it's gonna get ruined since Natalie has been a dipshit and lied to him. Ah...this drives me crazy. Thankfully, I'm not a diehard Jolie fan like a lot of people are but it is unfair to the fanbase. Not to mention, they have hardly gotten any alone time to be happy and have serious conversations. I haven't read to many spoilers about when Martyr drops the bomb. Hopefully John and Natalie can work through all this mess.

Ok, I'm convinced Vicki is the only person at Llanfair that has a brain. God knows Natalie, Jess (she hardly had all her marbles to begin with), and Joey don't have one and certainly Charlie doesn't. Again saying Vicki is the ONLY one with a brain is saying a lot since, ummm I dunno, Vicki has DID and this damn fiasco is going to bring Nicki Smith or one of her other alters back into full effect if she isn't careful. She needs to get rid of Charlie's ass! Ugh, I'm so tired of him being there for Echo. Every time Vicki turns a corner in her own damn house, Echo and Charlie are in an embrace. This story is so messed up cause it is patently obvious that no woman in her right mind would allow this to happen! Vicki is smarter than that and it's an insult to her character. Thank God Dorian is on tomorrow. She needs to zap some bitchiness into Vicki ASAP. I'll say this that I do love Vicki in that purple top. Looks pretty on her. Oh, and by the way. I love how all the Christmas decorations are up and on Wednesday it will be Christmas Eve in Llanview...REALLY?!?! I mean, technically it's only the Saturday night/evening after Thanksgiving on the show. Think about it, Nora went to Vicki's on Black Friday and got saved by Rex late that night and then the wreck happened and she was saved mid-morning on Saturday. Yet Christmas Eve is this Wednesday...supposedly, according to spoilers. Absurd, I tell you!

So, Ford was NOT at the hospital the whole time?! Gosh, I give up. I am kinda confused about all this. I need the flashbacks to become more elaborate. I'll wait until this week is over and then discuss my suspect list...again. le sigh. HOWEVER, I still think that Matthew maybe prime suspect number one. I'm telling you...this is Georgie Phillips 2.0. I feel it.

Oh, and I didn't discuss James and Starr because you know why? They have had the same conversation for a week now and the horse has just been beaten to hell and back. Enough!

Until tomorrow!
ME

"Even When You're Mad It Would Take a Lot More Than a Few Texts to Goad You Into the Arms of Another Woman. That's Why I Love You So Much."

Spoilers mentioned...

Well, I'm crying and my heart is breaking. I love nothing more than a Bo and Nora reunion and I enjoyed all their hugging and kissing but these hospital scenes are breaking my heart! Thanks Hillary Smith and Bob Woods for making me weepy during what is supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year...flippin' Christmas! Ah! I just can't take it...maybe because I know this heartfelt reunion is short lived and Bo begs her for forgiveness but she sadly kicks him to the curb on Tuesday 12/28. She should...shoe is on the other foot this time and he deserves it cause Nora called exactly "what happened" between Bo and Inez. I know they get back together, but I hope they get back together BEFORE they figure out what Inez did. So they can trust each other, etc. cause Bo now knows how Nora felt for, I dunno, over 10 years. We shall see. Not to mention, I want him to practically be crawling and begging and crying to get back with her since that is exactly what she did years ago and he was just like "ummm no." Moving forward, when the time comes they are happy again and get back together I have one simple request: Can they please move out of the damn garrett and back into their old house, the Barn?!?! Please TPTB? I beg of you. The garrett is smaller than my college dorm room. It's ridiculous. I mean, does Matthew sleep in the room with them? How in the world are you supposed to have sex (cause you know they do. That's ALL they did back in the 90's...geez)? Get the barn back for their reunion...please! By V-day if you can...

Besides the awesome B/N reunion, the rest of the show was kinda dull and ended with John McBain and his list of suspects. So, I think I'll discuss the Eddie Ford suspects and what I think about each. Hell, I am confused...not gonna lie. But let's take each person and discuss them, shall we? This will be fun.

List of Those Who Possibly Made Eddie Deadie

1. James--Eh, he didn't do it. McBain is even convinced since he crossed his name off the suspect list. Don't get me wrong, James has been getting his ass beat by his father since day one and I don't condone child abuse and James has every right to want to put Eddie 6 feet under. But...James is too sweet. Come on, the boy cries every other episode. He didn't do it...plain and simple. And it was just too obvious...

2. Nate--he is one at the top of my list. Ok, so we know that he was at the motel room and was standing over Eddie's body, etc. I have a couple of wild thoughts on this. Ok, so we know that Nate called Inez after the fight and said he had to go drop off Daniella. What if when he dropped her off, he went and got something of Todd Manning's (i.e., the cufflinks). Then Nate goes and kills Eddie and plants the cufflinks at the motel room so he can frame Todd? I know it's nuts but I'm trying to think outside the box. I don't think he would want to hurt Dani by setting up her dad but Todd doesn't have the best reputation so it could work. Then, getting rid of Todd would be one less thing Nate has to deal with when it comes to Dani.

Or what about this: Nate could have dropped off Dani and returned back to Inez's apartment and then sees Bo's gun on the chair and takes it and THEN goes and kills Eddie. Somehow he returns it after. Maybe? That's all I got right now. But, for some reason I do believe that Bo's gun is indeed the murder weapon. Just a sneaking suspicion.

3. Inez--She is at the top of my list, too. I mean, hello, they keep showing the damn flashback of her looking at Bo's gun. (Oh, and Jessica Leccia is not on contract. She is only a recurring character so she could easily be written off.) While Bo is enjoying his ambien-like induced coma, Inez could have taken the gun and shot Eddie and come back and put the gun back in the holster. Then you have to think, how did Inez know Eddie was at the Minuteman? I dunno, maybe that is something that hasn't been shown yet. Maybe James or Nate told her? Maybe Inez somehow knew Eddie's number and called him? Or, maybe James or Nate killed Eddie and then called Inez out of panic. I have no idea. I'm confused since Inez thought Clint didn't hold up his end of the bargain but then again this bitch could be lying. These flashbacks need to become a little better. They keep showing the same damn ones...grrr.

4. Clint--Hell, he is at the top, too. I'm sure he is pissed that Eddie didn't get Nora to Inez's apartment to see her and Bo get it on. So, maybe he went to the motel to straighten out Eddie and just ended up killing him? If you would have asked me this years ago, I would have said hell no but this Clint is evil. Also, Eddie is a lowlife and is expendable. If Clint found out from Eddie that he was rough housing Nora then Clint might have just gotten rid of him. I don't know why Clint would have gone to the Minuteman and spoken with the police (that's what he told Inez). So maybe he killed him and then went back later. Or...he could have gotten Mr. Black and Mr. Blue to come with him and one of them killed Eddie. Far fetched? Hells yes but I'm reaching here. And this is a soap opera, anything can happen.

5. Nora--She may be many things, but she is no killer. Yes, she pushed Colin McIver down the stairs back in the day but that was an accident. They are only making her not have any memory after the accident just to add to the suspect list. I just can't see her leaving the car and walking to the motel and getting a gun and killing Eddie. Maybe she tried to walk to the motel to get help but I just don't think so. Granted, she had every reason to blow him to kingdom come but just no.

6. Marty--I know, what the hell? But, I've heard her name getting thrown around. Do I think so...no. But she is bat shit crazy, so at this rate let's just add her to the endless names of Llanview peeps to kill EF. I could see her crazy ass pointing a gun at Eddie saying "Cole is in prison because of you! Rot in hell!" I kid, I kid. But, seriously she is nuts...

7. Todd--I just don't think so. How many times can he be charged with murdering someone? PLEASE! Ugh. I think he is def being set up and the only reason he will be a suspect besides the cufflinks is because he doesn't like abusive fathers since his dad was one, yada yada yada. I don't buy this. Another red herring.

8. Ford--Isn't he supposed to be in the hospital with Langston's horny ass straddling him in the bed while he recovers from being beaten by his dad at that creepy ass gym? How he would be the killer is beyond me and I just don't see it. Maybe I need to wait until next week to know a little more since I know Lang lies to the police...

9. Matthew--Again you're thinking, WTF? But lemme throw you my wild scenario: Ok, he was headed in the direction of the motel since we know he was the oncoming car that ran Rex and Nora off the road. AND...remember, Clint made Matt call Nora's cell phone and Eddie answered and mentioned the Minuteman. I mean, why else would Matt be driving all the way out there. So since James says he just "dropped the gun" at the motel and left Eddie there. Matt could have gone there to confront Eddie and his mom and just found Eddie there and then who knows what could have happened. I'm just saying. Yes, it's bizarre but oh well. I actually hope it isn't Matt since, hello, Rachel Gannon?! Ring a bell?? Nora has already had one child kill someone for her so let's not have another.

10. Bo--No, no way. But he will have to have an alibi, and I think a LOT of interesting things are gonna come out when he has to give up his story. Same thing goes for Inez. He will only be considered a suspect cause Eddie tortured his wife...that's it.

Unanswered Questions

I want to take time to discuss a few things that I just am curious about. Where in the hell is Eddie's bag? I mean it had Nora's cell in it and a shitload of cash.

Where is the gun that James left?

Where is all the tape and stuff and rope that was used to tie up Nora?

Where is Nora's gorgeous black and white plaid wrap she had? (you can tell I'm upset cause I loved it and want it found! Ah!) Where is her huge emerald cut rock? I know her wedding ring was found but where is the engagement ring? Oh, and where is her car? Her purse? She had a black purse with her...hmmm.

I have a feeling this whodunit is gonna be dragged out. I'd love a good murder trial. I felt OLTL hasn't had an awesome trial like that since Dorian on trial for Victor Lord's murder...that was AWESOME!

Enjoy the rest of your weekend and happy last minute shopping!